Imagination Running Wild..

Random post..

Dedicated to H..

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"Do you want me?" He asked, smiling knowingly.

She stared at him, hating the fact that she was exposed in every way possible.

"Answer my question.." He imitated the voice she used, every time he chose not to answer her questions.

"Well, your question isn't really clear.. you have to give me a clear definition for the word 'want'" She replied, thinking that she passed the danger zone by making her witty remark.

"Do you want to marry me?" He asked, gazing into her eyes, holding her face, and forcing her to look directly at him.

She closed her eyes, a tear forcefully escaping her secured eyelid.

He traced her tear with his finger, kissing where it stopped, just next to her lips.

He hugged her, feeling every emotion in her tense body melt with his touch.

He felt her love.

He felt her fear.

He felt her attachment.

His heart ached from the depth of the emotions being transferred to him; and he shuddered thinking of what she's going through right now. She was very fragile, and he knew it, but he liked the fact that he was her savior, her protector.

"Intay 7abeebty.." He said, hugging her even closer, trying to assure her that their love is going to last forever.

When in reality, both of them know that they are not meant to be.

She was his, without having to announce it; he had control over every fiber in her body.

They are the perfect match; their souls are made for each other.

But every other thing defies their love.

" I .. " She started, but his lips found hers immediately, savoring their taste, and preserving the sacred silence in which only their hearts were communicating.

She held onto him, only thinking about the moment.

" a7ibich .." He said, moving away before things get too far.

She looked at him, with pain in her eyes. Pain because all the love she has for him was weighing her down. She felt suffocated, she felt weak, she felt tired.

She looked at him, silently asking him to make the pain go away.

He observed her, hating the fact that pain fogged the spark in her eyes.

He scooped her once more in his arms, where they both felt at home.

He tightened his grip on her waist, and almost crushed her against him.

"Do I really have to go down on one knee?" He asked her.

Tears automatically brimmed her eyes again; this time he kissed her eyes tenderly.

"I love you.." She said it aloud for the first time, her voice shaking. She felt her whole body sigh as she verbally confessed for the first time that she loved him.

"Gooleeha ba3ad marra.." He whispered.

"a7ibik.." She replied sincerely, as she bit her trembling lips, "I don't want to lose you" She continued, her voice breaking.

He looked at her, and for the first time he was speechless.

Her words touched him so deeply; he felt his heart break as he watched her trying to compose herself.

He went down on one knee, and without a word he slipped the ring onto her slim finger.

He sat there admiring it, admiring the fact that she is now officially his no matter what anyone else says about it, while she stood still frozen.

She looked up at him, one glance, and she knew what was coming is worth the wait.

She closed her eyes tightly, wanting all the images she was creating to disappear. She was imagining again, this was her thing.

She wiped her eyes as she recalled their beautiful love story, perfect in her imagination. Every time she saw him, she imagined a love-filled conversation, where he would somehow confess all his feelings.

That day never came.

She watched him today, as he held another girl's hands. She watched him kiss her fingers. She watched them silently, wishing that she would die because it would be less painful. She hated herself for being so selfish. Shouldn't she be happy for him?

But how can she happy when all her dreams were shattered in front of her. He was everything she ever wanted, and still is; but life does that sometimes. It deprives you from the only thing you really want, need, and love.


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Hope you liked it..
And I will try my best to post the story (no promises when)..
TC!

Meant to be (part 42)

3eedkum mbarak mu2a5aran :p

w I hope everyone had a good break :)

Sorry for the extremely late post..

senior year is just hectic + it sucks unfortunately..

This is dedicated to everyone who commented on the last post ;)

Oh and this is a not-so-innocent post ;p (matches my mood for some reason ;P)

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----- M7ammad


When we got home, talked to my mom, and told her that she's going to study medicine. Yabibat and we laughed. She was extremely happy for her, since she knew that it was her dream.

For the first time since we got married, my mom looked at me with respect and pride in her eyes.

She announced that she wants to throw a party for Shai5a, since she didn't get a graduation party and all. A barbeque party she decided, tonight.

"mala da3ee 5alty.." Shai5a replied, smiling.

"La2 5ala9.. ana baroo7 ajahez kl shay.." My mom left us alone.

"Ha ya 7ilwa.. tabeen tit'3adeen il7een?" I asked her.

"Kaifik.. if you're hungry I'll eat with you" She said.

"No I ate in the hospital la2anich ti2a5artay.." I replied.

"And I drank coffee.. so I don't feel like eating.." She smiled.

"Ok then.. let's go.." I said, carrying her up the stairs, and ignoring all her complaints.

I went to the bathroom, and when I got out she was sitting on the bed, flipping through one of her books.

"Isn't that cool??!" She said, her eyes wide with excitement.

"Shno?" I said, as I sat beside her, peaking into the book.

"This is cool.." She said, pointing at the heart diagram, with the vessels looking like the cartoon-heart.

I smiled as I hugged her, and she leaned back on me in response.

"m7ammad.. don't you think I should go help 5alty in the kitchen?" She asked, looking up at me.

"I really don't think so.. I think we should sleep.." I said, tackling her so that she's under me now.

She rolled her eyes, and managed to slip from under me. I watched her get dressed, and head downstairs, laughing at my expression.

A couple of minutes later, she came back, and I laughed at her expression.

"I think I told you not to go.." I chuckled.

"She gave me the death stare and practically kicked me out of the kitchen.." She said, laughing.

"3ashan marra thanya tismi3een il kalam.." I continued laughing.

" Fine whatever.." She said, as she got into her pajamas again, and lied down next to me, and started blabbing about her day.

"Shai5a.." I interrupted after a couple of minutes.

"Shno?" She asked.

"I want to sleep, so I'm going to have to do this so you can shut up for a while.." I said as I pulled her next to me and kissed her lips devouringly.

I hugged her closer, giving her a quick last peck, and went to sleep immediately.




----- Shai5a


I stayed awake, since I was not accustomed to afternoon napping. So I basically watched him sleep for a while. I tried to get up a couple of times, but each time he would tighten his grip and mumble something incomprehensible.

I woke him up after two hours, because we have to get ready and go downstairs.

"M7ammaaaaaaad.. please goom" I whined after tons of nudges and pleas.

"A lady usually wakes her husband with a proper kiss.. until you do that I am not getting up.." He said in a serious tone, but humor was written all over his face.

"M7ammad.." I plead.

But he wouldn't budge.

"Fine.. just loosen your grip a bit so I can kiss you" I said, blushing already.

"Ok.." He said, as he loosened his grip.

I automatically freed myself completely, by ducking my head under his arm, and jumped out of bed.

"Yalla goom.." I laughed.

"You are so going to regret this.." He chuckled as he got out of bed, but I was in the bathroom already with the door safely locked.

"Do want to take a shower too?" I asked.

"Do you want me to join you?" He laughed.

"I'll be done in 30 minutes and then you can have the bathroom.." I said, as I rolled my eyes.

He didn't reply, but I could hear him laughing.



----- M7ammad


She got out of the bathroom after more than an hour, looking fresh and smiley.
I pointed at my watch, indicating the time she took.

"Sorry.. the water was really warm.." She smiled.

"It's alright" I said as I closed the bathroom door after me, "But don't think I forgot about my revenge!!" I shouted from inside.

I took a quick shower, got dressed, and I can see Shai5a still drying her hair, not half way done. She looked like she needed at least 2 more hours before she's ready.

"I am going to head down before you.." I told her as I sprayed perfume all over my dishdasha.

"Ok.. try to help 5alty around.." She replied. "You know I have no idea what to wear, if one of your sisters is downstairs send her up.." She added.

"Inshallah 7abeebty.." I said, as I closed the door.



----- Shai5a


He came up again, after about 5 minutes, he plopped himself on the coach next to me.

"Ana madry intay binthum wala ana waldhum?" He asked.

"Laish?" I asked him laughing.

"Umy 6ardatnee w tgool la tyee ila wiyaha.. Oh and she said I can help you pick an outfit.. but that's not going to happen.." He said.

"That's a wonderful idea!!" I told him.

"No it's not.." He said, bored. "Are you brushing your hair or the air?" He said, as he laughed at his own sentence.

He grabbed the comb from me, and started to brush my hair.

"Ouch!!" I said involuntarily as soon as he touched my hair, expecting him to be very rough.

"Tista3bi6een?" He asked, chuckling.

"Madry.. I thought you were going to pull my hair or something.." I laughed.

"There.. we're all done" He said after a while. He hugged me from the back, kissing the nape of my neck.

I felt like I needed to brush my hair more, just because I was obsessed with having it neat, but I didn't want to show that I'm ungrateful. And the kisses shut me up completely.

"A7ibich.." He whispered, making my insides flip.

"Intay t7ibeeny?" He asked in an even lower voice, and this time I felt my whole body flush. I felt my heart going violent, wanting to scream 'yes.. a7ibik'. But I was tongue-tied.

"Ee wala la2?" He continued asking. I was probably shivering, because he held my hand and I can feel him holding in his laugh.

"You are going to answer me sooner or later you know.." He said as he got up and pulled me with him towards the closet. "Pick something quickly.." He said, as he leaned on the wall.

Absent-mindedly I looked at the clothes, not really taking in what I was looking at.
I looked at him again, and he saw how lost I was.

"It's not a very formal thing.. so just pick any dress or whatever.." He said, trying to be helpful.

I sat down on the floor and stared at the clothes, again not really thinking about what I was going to wear.

"I like this one.." He said as he pulled out a long sky-blue dress, really simple but elegant.

"Ok, I'll wear it" I said as I waited for him to leave the changing room.

I sat on the chair, feeling exhausted for some reason, and got up to wear the dress after a while.

I applied minimal make-up, and we headed down together. The evening went pretty well, and soon it was time to sleep, I didn't say a word, and I guess he was too exhausted too because he was already asleep when I went to bed.



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Hope you liked it :)

You ask me..

I know ina u guys are bored from all the random posts..
but I honestly have no time to write a post 7ag the story..
I slept for one hour bas yesterday..
and this is just part of my venting process..

So.. Im extremely sorry..
and I promise you I will try my best to post this weekend..

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You ask me a simple question..

A question, with either a yes or a no, for an answer..

and yet, it's the most difficult question in my life..

How much do you love me?

You ask me, not bothering to ask if I do love you,

Even though I have never said it aloud..

You ask me, even though it's clear..

I love you more than anyone else..

And you know that..

But you still ask..

Even though you can see it in my eyes..

Even though you can sense it..

Even though you can almost touch the love in the air..

The love I carry around for you..

It's becoming a burden, difficult to carry around..

Loving you so much but not being able to actually tell you is torture for me..

I look into your eyes..

wanting you to confess your love..

wanting you to finally make my dreams come true..

But in your eyes..

I see my reflection..

I see my pain..

I see me..

and I see my love for you..

But I can't see you..

Because you refuse to let me in, not matter how hard I tried..


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Take care..

My Say on the Shared Story (2)

Dedicated to the brave lady.. and to #1 Anony :)

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First of all, I must say that it is very brave of you to write this. I hope you are feeling a little bit better.

Now, if there is one motto you should follow, it would be around the lines of: tomorrow is a new day, and yesterday is basically over. You should live your life day by day, and stop mourning about the past. Even though it's hard, and you feel like you're losing a part of your identity, but that phase will soon be over. You will be able to look back and be thankful for all the hardships that you went through because they helped shape the way you are now.

I won't focus on the part about your relationship with anyone, I will focus on you. You should try to sit down with yourself and discover who you really are, what you want, and just admit to yourself how you're feeling.

Sometimes people are just in denial, and they refuse to let go. When you say that you feel guilty because you feel like you are cheating on 3aziz, that is you in denial. You might be thinking that he will come back one day, but he isn't because he finally settled in the right place. He might be away from you, but you have to be sure that he happened for a reason, to make you a better person maybe, and he will always be a part of your past.

Your future now, has to involve you moving on. If you really love that guy, go for it, but try not to do it because you want to compensate for your lost love. Really think it through, maybe have a little time to yourself. If he loves you, he will always wait for you no matter what.

Be sure that your soul mate will "happen", whether you are expecting it or not. Try not to think about it and just enjoy yourself, and focus on emotionally recovering first.

I hope this helps .. :)



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Take care..

Shared Story (2)

This is another story..
she wanted to share..
and I hope you guys offer her some advice..
w I will write my advice in the next post inshallah..

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I was 13 when I first fell inlove. I meet him from flickr and I regret that knw we stayed together for a year he was the perfect guy I lied about something and he found out so he broke up with me.

After a year I logged in my fb and found an inbox from this guy let's call him 3aziz. He was thanking me for accepting his request. We started chatting kna we chat the whole time. Awl mngoom tell we go back to sleep he asked me for my email I don't knw why I gave him I felt like I could trust him. After a week of chatting on msn he told me that he was falling for me and I felt the same way so we became a couple. We talked day and night. Itha knt mt'9ygaa I would go to him he would always be their for me. After 5 months the day before my life becomes black I was chatting with 3aziz.

me*fenyy el 9y7aa
3ziz* laiish 7yatyy shfeech
me* t5ylt my life bdoonk
3ziz* mb a5leech

The next day was his first day for uni w anaa knt fl bait w I woke up at 7 bs 3shaan I be the first to wish him luck on his first day. I talked with him tell he got to uni and I went back to sleep at 4 I woke up 7saayt glbyy kaan bwgf. I talked to 3aziz bs he wasn't answering so I thought maybe he's with his friend aw shyy. I was sitting in the living room I was checking my fb when I saw a guys status Allah yr7m 3ziz al flanii. It was the same name of 3ziz I freaked out 6rsht a msg 7g the guy asked him whts the name of the guys father. But he took a while to answer so I told my friend to call him. She did and she called me she told me that it was him. I broke down I stayed a 2 weeks nt in the mood to talk to anyone I would cry every once in a while. After a year I had this guy friend that I knew for 3 years he told me that he loved me. I told him that I can't. He said that he understand and now a7s I'm falling for him. I don't knw wht to do if I tell him a7s inaa I will feel bad lnaa a5oon 3aziz Allah yr7ma :(.


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I hope you are feeling better..

My Heart..

Dedicated to Him..


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I love you, my heart would whisper every time you I see you...

You look at me, a hint of amusement in your eyes..

Did you hear that?

Of course not, because I have taught my heart the art of silence..

The art of thinking, but never talking aloud..

It betrays me sometimes, with a whisper escaping its closed chambers..

But you can't hear it..

Because my heart beats always manage to be louder..

Louder than its whispers,

louder than its sobs,

louder than its hopes..

My heart cries silently some more..

begging me to allow it to talk, to scream, to be heard..

It shivers as you get closer..

It begs me again..

It vows that it would be just one time..

Just one time, my heart would say,

It's just one time that it wants to be heard..

You stand in front of me..

I hold my breath..

For a moment, my heart stops beating..

My heart can hear you, you say..

My heart knows..

You place your hand on my heart,

You touched my heart..

You touched my soul..

You touched me..

And I can never forget that..

But you can..

and you already did..


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I will post the story whenever i'm free..
Im sorry walla.. adry maleetaw min the random posts..

My say on the shared story..

This is dedicated to sara for being brave and sharing her story..
This is my advice to you..
Simply.. Follow your heart..


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From what I read, I don't think that a7mad is the one your heart is set upon. I see Fahad being the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Now, whether you should pursue him or not, no you shouldn't. Fate will bring you together, and your love will blossom in the right way. If you ever do see him, maybe you should let him know that you do love him. Not directly, just try to get the message across subtly, 3ashan yadry ina you still want him to be part of your life. Give him the green light, but the rest is up to him.

If he did hurt you, forgive and forget. You are hurting yourself more by choosing not to forgive him. Everything can be fixed. If he cut right through your heart, it can be stitched again. Scars define us as human beings, and they make us more beautiful and real.

Whether you end up marrying him or not, w inshallah you will, be sure that your husband is the one for you. You will love him more than you loved anyone else, w after all your years together you will look back and think that you didn't love anyone else. You had feelings for people before, but your feelings for your husband will be surely different.

Should you tell your husband about the people you used to love? No, you shouldn't, and that is my alterable opinion. I haven't thought about this point thoroughly, but I think if I was in your place, I would leave that detail out of our conversation. If you were asked, you tell the truth of course. But otherwise, you don't need to bring the subject up.

Final Note: I am a firm believer in love. You will be united with your loved one, even if you didn't expect to spend the rest of your life with this person. If it's meant to be, then it will be.


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Hope this helped..

Shared Story

Hello :)
So below is someone's story..
she would like to share it with you and just let it all out. .
please offer advice if you have any..
Otherwise.. it just helps to talk to someone who doesn't know you..
So i Guess this can be considered as part of the healing process..

*Names have been changed..

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i guess today was the day i decided to let go of it all!
I wonder when did I first learn to love?
At the age of 13 I made that decision to commit…
Not to any one, but a member of the royal family…was I that materialistic from a young age??!! Did the watches he gave me blind my eyes…was I charmed with his smile, did his light tan really make me love him??!!
But based on what did I think I’m in love…the smile I felt forming across my check bones, or the heartbeats I felt pumping in my chest?? Or was I simply trying to making every girl jealous by putting my hands on the new item that dropped in school??!!
I guess a7mad was overwhelmed with my beauty himself, I myself came from a high class well known family..i knew the standers I was expected to end up with and thus I aimed for.
You may say I’m the type of girl that get’s what she wants… I put my eyes on something, I work on getting it and yes you guessed it right I actually do get it…and like all of you, as soon as I get it I feel like I don’t need it anymore…
Stuff moved fast and the next thing you know, I had my first boyfriend…he’s just a year older than me..14 at the time…
We were the young sweet hearts….my friends would gather around us and smile at the image of us sitting next to each other…you’d hear one call out: ‘you’ll end up having gorgeous babies.’
After 2 weeks of passion, I was forced to leave a7mad…since my sister found out…she had no chose but to tell my mother…everyone at school was talking about us!
So we broke up…I guess that’s when I realized I really liked him…
No..the story doesn’t end here…it goes on…but not with Nasser…
I felt really lonely at this stage of my life, that’s when my friends grew closer to me…
But that’s when the unexpected happened….my friends ex-boyfriend claims he’s into me…
He’s no more than a brother…
We grew closer as we talked, he paid attention to what I said, he listened and respected me…he himself comes from a well known family.
I started to like him…I admit…
As I grew older I knew whats wrong and whats right, whats acceptable in our society and whats not, that’s when I backed out….
Long story short..i guess my so called friend, the hand that pulled me from the dead is the same that wants to spend his life with me!
I was shocked..but I left everything as it is and moved on…
After 5 years…this same person comes back..holding the same exact feeling for me..
But now is it love??
Im much grown, my brain can digest this all.
I know for a fact a friend of mine holds feelings for him…but she hurt me once…was I the kind of person to hurt her back?!
I sit with myself, and yes I saw a future for both of us…a possibility maybe
Until..he thought he knew me well…
That’s when I said goodbye…
Are those two men I know worth me?? I don’t think so..a7mad..oh my I guess bumping into you now will just decide if there was ever love…I admit I hate my self for thinking I loved you..you where a crush..nothing but that….why did I ruin my past with you…how can I ever stand in front of my husband and say yes I did have a boyfriend…or should I lie….everything is different now….
But you fahad…you knew so much….you knew about a7mad….you still took me as I am…but to use me to show yourself how much of a man you are then your wrong….im worth so much as I know it…I stood with my head high on graduation night, I looked in your fathers eyes thinking ill be part of your life one day…but sadly my fairy tale got shattered….
If I was to ask you something now I’d just ask if you really loved me?? was I really gonna be the mother of your children??
To be honest you’re the only man I felt warm as I talked to…you made me smile and feel upset…but hell yes you hurt me, you said what no one else had said…so as much as you wanted me to be yours I wanna make you stay away…
Ive always been know for being a strong person but I guess when I see you, I’ll know if what I did is the right thing or not..
Thankyou for reading…I feel so much better now, and knowing that all your readers might read this makes me smile…
I guess you were right opening up is what I really needed…am I alone?? No im not…ive got my family…and that’s enough..and you and your readers are for sure part of it.
Thankyou again
sara..


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Inshallah I will post soon..

My fairytale..

Hello again :)
So I received emails from some people.. asking about my own love story..
So I decided to write this post,
and of course, since I am not that discrete, people are starting to 'discover' my identity ;p
So i decided to clear things up :)
Ya3ny im letting you, my lovely readers, in..


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My story..

a bit complicated,

yet very typical..

girl loves boy.. not sure if love is the word though..

Sometimes I feel like it's an understatement..

Boy (or man in my case since he is older - and let us just keep it at that) does not know about girl..

Maybe he does, but he's choosing to ignore?

I mean come on, sometimes I feel like "In love" is practically written on my forehead or something..

Or maybe he wants to do something about it but is waiting for the right time?

But then again, I think that's just my mind playing games..

Anyways..

So their paths cross sometimes..

Is it fate?

Or is he just trying to torture her?

Or is she over-analyzing everything to do with him?

All of the above maybe?

Who knows..

So she lives for the hope that she will see him..

She wakes up wishing that he will pass by today..

She fears losing him..

losing the hope for a future together..

They have nothing..

no history together..

a clean record when it comes to each other..

But in her heart.. he is all there is to her past and her future..

She loves him?

Again, is an understatement..

Does he?

Who knows..

Fine.. no he doesn't ..

but then again, he might..

Is it going to work out?

That is for all of us to find out..

Let us just hope that she finds the strength to wait patiently..

the power to watch silently..

and the heart to love secretly..



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So my dear readers.. what I write..
is a figment of my imagination, and I did mention this earlier..
it might be based on a glance, a word (not directed to me even), or simply from all the feelings that I have inside of me..

I know that some of you were thinking its a long, never-ending love story..

bas inshallah I am hoping that someday it will turn into one..
and we will love happily ever after :)

Feel free to share your stories too..

and if you want me to post about your story, then email it to me
shushuxd@gmail.com

and I will do just that!

Take care ;)

Tonight..

Hello :)
madry shfeeny I'm posting a lot these days even though im really busy ;p
I guess I just have a lot of feelings bottled up inside of me..
Some are too sacred for me to share..
But some manage to escape the restrictions I have put for them..
I will leave you with the post..


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I beg you to come tonight..

Let us hold hands under the glowing moon..

Let us count the scattered stars..

Let us name all the trees..

Let us call out for the migrating birds..

Let us play with the wet sand..

Let us fight the cold ocean waves..

Let us fall on our backs..

Let us laugh at our silliness..

Let us pretend we're kings and queens..

Let us rule the world together..

Let us be the best of friends..

Let us be lovers..

Let us love and be loved..

Let us hug one time only..

Let us look into each other's eyes..

Let us fall asleep in each other's arms..

Let our innocent love bloom..

Come and visit me in my dreams once more..

I beg you to come tonight..



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Hope u liked it..
I will post a part for the story soon inshallah!! :)

Meant to Be (Part 41)

Hiii :)
The part is finally written ;p
w why is the blogger world sleeeeeeping??!

This one is dedicated to:
Dont.Dwell, bint almeharir, madliar, A, and hano.Oshi


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----- M7ammad


Shai5a decided that she didn't want to go shopping anymore. It was the weekend so we had family gathering to attend, and so we were somewhat busy.

Ti7ajibat Shai5a on Saturday, a day before university.

"You look gorgeous.." I told her, kissing her forehead.

"La tjamilny.." She pouted.

"Walla 9ij you look beautiful.." I tried encouraging her, as I pushed her through the door.

"M7ammad.. I don't look nice.. please I don't want people to see me like this.." She said, trying to get back in.

"Yummaaaaaaa.. Shai5a ti7ajibat.. ta3alaw shoofoohaaaa!!" I screamed.

"M7ammaaaad!!" She hid her face.

We were interrupted by the camera flashes and screams of children. Everyone was excited and hyper, especially the little children because they loved her so much.

After all the congratulations and endless chitchats, we headed to our room at night.

"I really don't feel like going to uni tomorrow.." She complained after we were tucked in bed.

"You're going to love it.. don't worry.." I assured her.

"Bas my friends kilhum ra7aw engineering w one of them medicine w il bajee are studying abroad.. ya3ny no one is with me in English Lit.." She complained.

"Don't worry.. you'll do fine.." I laughed.

She sighed, worriedly.

"Good night.." I told her, smoothing her hair.

"Sweet Dreams.." She replied, smiling.

The next day was spent trying to calm Shai5a's nerves before she goes to university; I was going to drop her off before I go to work. So I spent all the way comforting her, even though she was not really paying attention to me, which meant she wasn't paying attention to the road. She was up for a surprise of course, and she was clueless.

I got to the university, opened the car's door, and walked her to the door.

"M7ammad.. hathy moo il jam3a!!" She said after a while of starring at the building.

"Imbala.. this is where you are going to be studying for the next 7 years.." I told her.

"M7ammad!!! Hathy kuliyat il 6ib!" She replied, dumbfounded.

"I know.. yalla you don't want to be late for your first lecture!" I laughed at her expression.

"Bas.." She trailed off, still shocked.

"Look.. I know that it's your dream to be a doctor, you told me so, and I asked my sisters more about it and all of them said so.. Therefore, I went to your father and told him that I want you to be a doctor so that we can understand each other more.. which is of course BS because we don't really need that.. anyways.. so he didn't mind.. fa sa7abt awragech min english literature, and now you are officially a medical student.." I explained.

"No way!" She said wide-eyed.

"Shai5a!! Yalla you're going to be late!!" I told her, pushing her inside.

"Umbaaaay!!" She said, finally realizing what was happening.

"Di5lay.." I laughed as I pointed to the door.

"Oh my god M7ammad.." She hugged me tightly.

I kissed her forehead, smiling, and pointed at the door when she let go of me.

"Ok.." She breathed, as she pushed the door and entered.

I smiled to myself, knowing that I did the right thing, and went to work, making a mental note to pick her up on time.



----- Shai5a


The time was going by really fast, and thankfully, I saw a couple of familiar faces so we walked together for the rest of the day. The professors seemed ok, and were just introduced to the program and the course outline.

It was time to leave so I said good-bye to my friends, and took some books and handouts that were handed out to us, and went outside looking for him.

He waved, as he got out of the car and took my books from me.

"La2.. 3adee ana asheelhum!" I told him.

"I got it!!" He said, carrying them, and putting them in the trunk.

I held his hand and excitedly chatted about my day, while he played with my fingers and listened intently.

"Ya3ny are you happy now?" He asked.

"More than happy.. ecstatic.. walla M7ammad you have no idea how grateful I am to you.. I love you.." I blabbered, but when I realized what I just said, I stopped and placed my hand on my mouth shutting it.

"Wayed wala shwaya?" He asked, teasing me.

I remained quiet, dumbfounded by how fast things were progressing.

"I love you too, you know.." He said, kissing my pinky.

The rest of the ride was silent of course, with my insides all churning and my heart basically running marathons.



__________________________________

Hope you enjoyed :)

Getting Over you..

Helloo..
I know I haven't been posting a lot..
bas school started and im extremely busy..
inshallah I will post very soon..

This one is for Him..

___________________________________








I was trying to get over you..

but as usual you decided to interfere just before I end my anguish..

Just before I decide to forget about my long painful nights, you decide to show up..

You end my misery for a day,

but you end up opening up all the wounds..

today you are here, carefully mending them..

but tomorrow you aren't,

and I am left alone..

tired,

depressed,

confused,

and in pain,

waiting for you to come back..

because you are my doctor..

you are my savoir..

you have the magic spell to cure me ..

you can cast it..

and yet you won't..

you prefer to leave me hanging..

you prefer to leave me suffering..

you prefer knowing that I will always be in need for you..

I will always be waiting for you..

I will always love you..

But you forgot to consider that I am in deep pain..

Really deep pain..

Waiting for your love..

Waiting for you to caress me ..

waiting for your tender touch..

I love you, I would repeat every night..

with no answer..


____________________________________________


Take Care :)

A glimpse into the Future..

Hellooooooo ;)
3eedkum Mbarak.. w sorry ina its late ;p
w I hope all of you are enjoying eid more than i am ;p

This post is "a glimpse into the future" of shaikha and m7ammad...

I felt like writing bas i dont have time for a whole post..

Dedicated to H..

_______________________________________






"Shaikha.." He called in a desperate voice.

"Shfeek?" I replied, mi5tar3a.

"aby abooooos!!" He screamed from behind the bathroom door.

"Moo min 9ijik M7ammad!" I said, rolling my eyes.

"Imbala min 9ijy.. yalla 6il3ay" He insisted.

"many 6al3a.." I said stubbornly.

"Shayoo5.. bala dala3.. walla aby aboos!!" He replied.

"No.." I stated.

"Tara walla akser il bab!!" He screamed crazily.

"M7ammad.. la t9eer maynoon! Il yahal tawhum naymeen tara!!" I exclaimed, opening the bathroom door.

"Ta3alaaaaaay.." He said with a goofy smile, as he pulled me towards him.

"Inzain.. one minute.. ilnas ma yboosoon 3ala 6ool.. they hug awal.. ba3dain.." I told him, trying to get away.

"Ok.. here you go.." He replied instantly.

He took both of my hands into his, and put them behind him, leaving them hanging on his waist. He pulled me even closer to him, and enclosed my body with his strong arms. He rubbed my back gently, making want to melt right there. Isn't this more romantic than a kiss, I thought to myself, sighing.

My answer was given to me almost automatically, as if he read my mind. Our lips met in the most perfect gesture, making me lose my breath right away. Nothing can beat this, the kiss screamed.


______________________________

Hope you like it! ;)

Meant to Be (part 39)

This one is dedicated to Nawarii, saron28, D E, Lulu..

W mbarak 3aleekum il shahar..

I feel guilty posting this b ramadan ;p
Bas you guys waited too long adry!!
Sorryyyyyyyyyyy.. walla I'm very very very busy!!

w hope you like it..

ma ra7 agool I will not post in this month..
la2ana in general I dont have time to post..

w this story has from 5-10 posts more.. w then it will finish!!


______________________________________






----- M7ammad

"M7ammad.. 5ala9 moo lazem ta5eth ijaza.." She said after she closed the phone.

"Laish?" I asked.

"Bas.. aroo7 wiya umy il 9ib7.. I talked to her w galat ok.. w agdar aroo7 wiyak il 3a9er or with any of my cousins.." She replied.

"Ok.. kaifich.." I told her.

And for 4 days I would take her out every night, we would go to the mall, she would buy a few things, then we would watch a movie, have dinner, and then go back home.
One afternoon she told me that she wants to go with one of her cousins, and my sister Mariam will go with them too. I gave her the green light, and decided to take a nap as I waited for her to come back.

It was about 5 when they left, and when I woke up, it was 9.

Rubbing my eyes, I searched for my phone to call her. Her phone was switched off. I called my sister, her phone was switched off too. I went downstairs, literally hunting for something to eat since I was starving. Thankfully, I go there in time before they remove the dinner from the table.

After I finished, I sat with my mom and brother, w ba3dain 6ila3 ra7 il diwaniya. I waited and waited, I called her a few times but it was the same thing. The clock struck 11 and my mom went to sleep.

So I was left alone in the living room, thinking where the hell is she?

I went outside, and waited for her in the garden. I contemplated whether or not I should go to them, but then again I don't even know what mall she went to. Was I overreacting? It's almost 12, I looked at my watch angrily.

We came earlier than 12 every single night because I didn't like the kind of people that went to malls after that time, and that was when I was with her. Now they're girls, all alone, and they're still not back.

Why the hell did I agree to letting her go, I have no idea.

I paced in the driveway furiously, getting more and more impatient every second.
My watch beeped, indicating it was 12, which ticked me off. I called Shai5a and my sister one last time, before deciding to call Shai5a's mother.

I apologized and explained that shai5a is still not here, hoping that she would call her cousin or give me her number so I can at least know that she's ok.

After a couple of minutes her mom called saying that her cousin wasn't answering her phone.

I almost lost it right then if I didn't hear a car's engine really close. The car slowly approached the house, showing how hesitant the driver was.

Mariam stepped out first, and then Shai5a stuck to her. Her cousin left quickly, leaving the three of us standing alone.

I looked at my watch, 12:29. Silently I pointed to the door so they can go inside before me. They stood in the living room eyeing me nervously, but I left both of them shocked, making my way upstairs.




----- Shai5a



"He just went upstairs.. and he didn't say a word.. " I told Mariam.

"yimkin moo m3a9eb.." She said.

"Did you see his face?" I asked her irritated.

"You have a point.." She laughed.

"Waaaay.. Mariam, what am I supposed to do now??!" I freaked out.

"Madry.." She replied coolly.

"Please come upstairs with me.." I almost begged.

"yalla ok.." she agreed.

"Inzain.. please please di5lay gably.." I told her when we reached our room.

"Yalla 3ad Shai5a.." She opened the door and pushed me inside, then she ran downstairs.

I looked around, really scared, but he was not in the living room.

Slowly, I went inside the bedroom, and I saw him take his pillows and make his way to the couch.

He didn't even acknowledge my existence, not once did he look in my direction.
A lonely tear found its way to my cheek. I sat on the edge of the bed, thinking about what to do.

He'd never let me sleep if I'm mad at him. I should at least apologize, I thought to myself. I took a couple of minutes to gather up my courage, and then I sat on the couch facing him.

With his eyes still closed, he turned around, making me face his back instead of his face now.

This is not going to be easy, I rubbed my eyes, and sat on the floor next to the couch immediately.

"M7ammad.." I called, but he didn't reply.

I called him a couple of times, but he didn't reply, so I gave up.

"Ok.. don't talk to me.. but please just sleep on the bed.." I said sadly.

He ignored me again, so I went back to bed hopelessly. I knew he was not sleeping; he was too mad to be sleeping anyways. As much as his face was composed, his breathing wasn't and his muscles were tense and it showed.

I sighed as I got up to change, and closed the lights.

Of course, I couldn't sleep, I stayed for about 2 hours tossing in bed. I felt so lonely; I realized that I got used to him being close every night, hugging me, wishing me a good night softly. I just couldn't go to sleep without counting his heart beats and feeling his chest rise and fall against mine.

Walking slowly, I went next to the window, which was directly in front of the couch, and looked for the moon. It was nowhere to be found in the extreme darkness of the sky; automatically I felt even more depressed.

I sat on the floor next to his couch and hugged my knees closer to me.
"Laish moo nayma leel7een?" He asked.

"M7ammad?!" I said surprised; I thought he was asleep.

"T3alay yamy.." He said, scooting over.

I lied down beside him, but there was barely enough place for both of us to sleep on the couch. I was about to fall, but he moved me on top of him. Every single part of my body shivered when it touched his at first. Oddly, I felt comfortable. I felt safe, I felt home. My head was on his chest, and his heartbeats were more audible than ever.

I raised my head to look at him, and our eyes met. Mine started filling instantly, and his softened as he noticed my eyes brimming with tears.

"I'm sorry.." I managed to say, as I placed my head on his chest once more, eager to listen to his heartbeats that managed to calm me down once more.

"Wain kintaw?" He asked.

I explained the whole thing, how we went shopping, then we went to a dinner, then we saw a couple of friends and they practically forced us into going to a movie with them. It was about 11 when we left the movie theater, and when we went to our cars, they found that their car was not working. So we waited for a person to come and take a look at it; and take the car to the garage. After that, we took each one of them to their house and we came.

He was quiet for a couple of seconds.

"Marra thanya mako 6al3a wiya a7ad.." He said sternly.

"Inshallah.." I replied automatically not wanting him to get mad again.

He sighed and carried me to bed, and we stayed in the same position, with me on top of him, hugging him tightly.

"M7ammad.. za3lan?" I asked.

"Ee za3lan.." He said.

I pouted, thinking of a way to make it up to him. But really I didn't have to. He moved me, so I was now underneath him. He kissed me, devouring my lips first and then moving on to my neck.

He stopped there and looked at me, smiling.

"moo za3lan il7een" He stated cheekily.

I rolled my eyes, laughing at him.

That night, when he hugged me, I looked into his eyes and I saw all the love in them. I knew he was the one right then. I actually think I knew a long time ago.

"I love you.." I whispered.

"Shno?" He mumbled, really sleepy.

"Good night.." I said.

"Good night.." He replied smiling.


________________________________

Hope you enjoyed!!

One last time?

Dedicated to H..


____________________________







I'm going to miss you.. akeed you'll ask why now?! why are you telling me this now?! well.. la2ana 5ala9 I'm going to block all your memories and delete you out of my life, my brain, maybe my heart too .. I loved you with my all .. bas 5ala9.. maleeeeeeeet.. it's hard .. it's painful.. it's confusing.. you make me feel 10 years older .. and at times you can make me feel 10 years younger ba3ad .. I wish I can have closure.. with you it's not possible.. damn it what am I saying .. what am I trying to do? I still love you.. I will love you for the rest of my life .. bas it's not meant to be.. It's not like we had anything.. it was a figment of my imagination based on thin strings that are almost invisible to the people around us.. but I saw them.. for some reason I saw them.. they were like the light at the end of the tunnel.. they were all my hopes and dreams.. they were everything .. and nothing in the same time.. I wish I can hate you .. I wish I can despise you instead of all the love I carry around for you.. sometimes your love is like a burden.. it gets so heavy.. it's almost impossible to carry.. but impossible to get rid of in the same time.. I have no idea why I'm so attached to you.. to the idea of you there forever and ever.. I love you I would repeat in my head.. I love you I would plead every single night.. I love you I would beg every single shooting star.. I love you I would cry helplessly over and over .. I love you.. I'm sick of those three beautiful words.. I wish you would wake up and realize that I am right here.. waiting for you to look up.. waiting for your eyes to smile with acknowledgment.. but you refuse to do that.. you refuse to be the reason for my happiness.. you refuse to let me in your life.. but what you don't know is that only the thought of you makes me get up in the morning.. the idea of having you close to me one day is the only reason I smile.. You are in every breath I take.. Your smile is reflected on every drop of water.. No matter how much you tried to deprive me from yourself.. I loved you more and more.. you fought me back with all your strength.. all you wanted to prove is that you are not the one for me.. but you were all along.. you still are.. and you will be for the rest of my being.. I'm tired of fighting for you.. you can have it your way if that's what you want.. if you want us to stay apart for the rest of our lives then you can have that.. if all you care about is for your path never to cross mine then you can have that too.. if you don't want me to know anything about you.. then I want you to know that you're being too harsh on me .. you're asking too much.. but I'm willing to give you even that.. I'm saying good-bye now and forever .. I want you to know that no farewell is ever going to be enough for me.. you were my strength one day.. and today you are my only weakness.. I love you one last time I will whisper to the darkness.. I love you..



It's hard to mourn over something you had.. but it's even harder to mourn over something you never had..

Meant to Be (Part 38)

This post is dedicated to Unchained Melody and Mrs. Chuck Bass...
and I think it's the longest I ever wrote!!

and my email is
shushuxd@gmail.com


______________________________







----- m7ammad


Days passed and I got better. I had to go to work, b mustashfa il 3adan. Things were getting better between me and Shai5a.

"M7ammad.. aby aroo7 wiyak il dawam bacher.." She said one night.

"5air inshallah.." I told her as I hugged her and closed my eyes.

"M7ammad.. min 9ijy!!" She stated.

"Shno ya3ny tyeen wiyay il dawam?" I replied sleepily.

"Ya3ny il 9ib7 lamma agoom 3ashan atrayag wiyak.. ma ared dary w ag3ad bidoon sh'3l.. aroo7 wiyak instead.." She said.

"La2.." I told her simply.

"Laish la2?!" She asked.

"Bas.." I replied, not in the mood for discussing anything now.

"M7ammad.. ma y9eer chithy.. tgawimny il 9ib7 mbacher w ana ma 3ndy shay asawy.. w ma tir'6a aroo7 ashte'3el wala mukan.. w ga3da bl bait.. w malal.. w aby ayee wiyak!!" She complained.

"Ya3ny lee hal daraja t7ibeeny? Ma tigdereen tig3ideen bidoony wala digeega?" I teased her, hoping that it would make her stay quiet.

"Eee eee.. lee hal daraja a7ibik!!" She said to my surprise.

I opened one eye to look at her, and she was pouting and in no state to sleep. I laughed at I sat up and opened the lights.

"Intay shaklich moo nawya tnameen.." I yawned.

"Ee ma ra7 anam leeman tir'6a ta5ithny wiyak.." She sat up too.

" No way.." I shook my head.

"EE laish ya3ny??!" She asked, and she moved so she could face me.

"La2ana dawamy kila riyayeel w looya w ma abeech tit3ibeen wiyay.." I replied.

"M7ammad.. it's a hospital.. akeed ra7 ykoon feeha riyayeel w looya.. besides I want to stay in your room and see your patients.." She said stubbornly.

"Is this argument going to go on forever?" I laughed at her serious facial expressions.

"It will end as soon as you say 'yes' " She urged.

"Give me one good reason.." I told her.

"Because it's my dream.. to be a doctor.. and since I can't be one.. then please I just want to pretend to be one for one day only.." She held my squeezed my hands, and looked at me with her beautiful brown eyes compelling me to say yes.

"W mno gal you can't be a doctor?" I asked.

"Ubooy.." She said as she looked away.

"Bas ana il mas2ool 3anich il7een moo ubooch.." I told her.

"Hatha moo maw'6oo3na il7een.." She told me, blinking away the tears.

"3ayal shno maw'6oo3na?" I teased her.

"Wala shay .." She sighed and lied down avoiding eye contact.

"Ya3ny za3lana?" I asked as I peeked in her face.

"la2.. bas ti3abt w banam.." She said as she moved further away.

"Shda3wa ti3abtay.. 3ayal bacher shlon ra7 t9eereen doctor?" I asked her, moving closer.

"M7ammad.. bas maly 5ulg atna8ash.." She closed her eyes tightly.

"Ana ma aby atna8ash.. ana agool goomay 6al3ay hdoomich 7ag bacher 3ashan ma t2a5reeny il 9ib7.." I kissed her shoulder.

"Ya3ny ra7 ta5ithny??" She asked hesitantly.

"Ee ra7 a5thich wiyay.. bas la tit3awideen.." I laughed.

"Gool walla!!" She sat up excitedly.

"Shno li3ba .. ana gitlich shay ya3ny 5ala9.." I told her.

"Omg!! Thank youuuuuu.." She screamed as she jumped out of bed and ran to her closet.

I followed her and watched as she threw a couple of garments on the chair.

"6ayartay ilnoom min 3ainy.." I complained.

"Ay outfit a7san?!" She ignored my remark.

"Madry.. why does it matter anyways.." I said as I sat on the other chair.

"Are you seriously asking me this question?" She rolled her eyes.

"Ok.. I have a suggestion for you.." I said as I got up and dug into my closet to find the scrubs that I got a while ago. They were small but I didn't have time to return them. "There.." I said as I held them up when I found them.

"Brilliant.." She threw the black pants on the floor and took the scrubs from me carefully.

"You like?" I asked her, grinning.

"I love.." She smiled excitedly. "I'm going to try them on.." She said, running to the bathroom.

I rolled my eyes and waited for her. She opened the door after a while and peeked.

"This is too amazing!!" She said, stepping out. "A little too big though.." She continued.

The shirt was sort of baggy and it reached almost mid-thigh and the sleeves reached her elbows. The pants were a bit long.

"Awal shay.. you need a pin here.." I said pointing to the waistline. "Thany shay.. you look hot.." I winked.

"I am sooooo excited.. walla M7ammad .. thank you soooo much!!" She blabbered.

"Inzain.. yalla we need a good night sleep 3ashan you can rock the hospital tomorrow.." I told her as I went to bed.

"Ok.. I'm going to change and sleep.." She said as she went to the bathroom again.

I was too sleepy so I didn't bother to open my eyes when she came to bed, all I did was hug her when she came closer.

She mumbled something and we both drifted to sleep.



----- Shai5a


I woke up extra early the next morning, I don't think I slept properly a9lan. I took a shower, got dressed, and then woke M7ammad up.

I prepared quick breakfast as he took a shower and we left to work after breakfast. The ride to the hospital was quiet; I was too excited and he was sleepy as usual.
I sat next to him and pretended to be his assistant for the day. He rescheduled his surgeries because, according to him, there is no way I will be allowed in the operating room.

"Il7een my break.. ana baroo7 ayeebly something to drink.. and you stay here .. do you want anything?" he asked as he got up.

"water please.." I said as I smiled.

I sat on his chair and waited patiently for him to come back. I wanted to ask him about some of the cases and I didn't have a chance to do so earlier.

The door opened, and a really tall woman came in. I looked at her and smiled.

She frowned as she checked the room number and looked at me again.

"Dr. M7ammad will come back ba3ad shway.." I told her.

"Aha.. w intay mno?" She asked eyeing me.

"Ana.." I started, but stopped as he came inside the room.

"M7ammad!! There you are.." She beamed when she saw him.

She was almost as tall as him, I noticed. And she had a killer figure too. She's annoying me already I thought to myself.

"Oh.. hey there.." he replied as he came and sat next to me.

"Ma shiftik ilyoom.. fa gelt ayee ashoof shfeek.." she said as she glanced my way.

"Tislimeen.. ma feeny shay 3adee.." He told her.

"Ahaa.. w mno hathy?" She asked as she pointed at me.

3yoony 6la3at min mukanha when she said that. She talks as if I was an intruder or someone she hates.

He introduced us to each other. I was simply "Shai5a" not his wife or anything, and she was "Dr. Dana" and of course she didn't like the formal name, instead she wants him to call her "Dana" or maybe "Dandoon" she laughed.

I smiled politely even though I was burning from the inside.
She sat down and took off her coat, as if it was the most normal, routinic thing she ever did.

She talked to M7ammad mostly, actually all of the time. She would glance my way, in the most despicable manner and engage herself with M7ammad.

Thankfully, his break was over soon, and her cue was an elderly patient that knocked the door and entered tiredly.

He smiled at me sensing my discomfort, and I kept quiet and smiled at the old man in front of me.

Who was she anyways to barge in and talk to him like he was her best friend. I mean if she was his best friend, then why didn't he bother to tell me about her sooner. And why does it have to be her with those extremely long legs? And why can't she at least be polite to me?

I sighed as the patient left, and M7ammad went outside for a couple of seconds then locked the door on his way in.

"Shfeech?" He asked with a smile.

"Ma feeny shay" I replied coldly.

"3ayal laish mazajich ti'3ayar min awal ma d5alat Dana?" He asked again.

"Mno Dana? Gool Dandoon a7san.." I stared at him with my eyebrows raised.

He laughed out loud, and I got up but he caught my hand, still laughing.

"mako shay y'6a7ek tara.." I told him.

"Ya3ny intay m3a9ba 3ashan Dandoon il7een?" He asked, trying but failing to sound serious.

"Hid eedy M7ammad.." I said, feeling the anger rise when he called her Dandoon.

"5ala9 5ala9.. I'm sorry.." He looked at me sincerely.

"a9lan mno hathy?" I asked.

"Dandoon.. a89id Dr. Dana.." He said.

I stared at him for a while before deciding to let it go.

"W mno Dr. Dana inshallah?" I continued.

"Wa7da.. kil yoom tig3ad tsoolef wiyay.. my friends hate her and.." He started.

"walla ma aloomhum.." I interrupted him.

"and apparently so does my wife then.." He laughed.

"W why did you forget to mention that I'm your wife?" I fumed.

"La2ana mamnoooooooo3 .. ma y9eer intay tkooneen hny a9lan.. this is a hospital not a hotel.. w loo ana ma a3arf il mudeer w amoon 3alee chan ma ri'6a.." He explained.

I looked at him to check if he was saying the truth, and he looked sincere I concluded.

Someone tried the door and then knocked it.

"Leel7een za3lana?" He asked.

"Open the door.." I ignored his question.

"ma ra7 afta7 until you say 'no' " He laughed.

"M7ammad.." I pointed at the door.

"La2.. yalla goolay moo za3lana 3ashan afta7.. ti5ayilay a patient is in dire need now w intay ily m3a6lita!!" he said.

"Fine.. moo za3lana.. go open the door.." I said, smiling in spite of myself.

He blew me a kiss as he went to open the door, and a young guy entered with him.



----- M7ammad


After I examined him, I started writing the prescription after assuring him that nothing serious is going on.

I looked at him after finishing everything but he was too busy looking at something behind me. I looked around and there was Shai5a with her long hair strewn all over her back. She bent to pick up the elastic to adjust her hair into a ponytail once more.

I called his name angrily, gave him his paper and he left; of course not without casting another long glance on Shai5a.

She sat next to me again.

"Aby akalmich b maw'6oo3 lama nred il bait.." I told her trying to stop myself from running after the guy and punching him.

"Shfeek?" She asked concerned.

"Wala shay.." I said, gritting my teeth.

Another patient came in just in time, to take my mind off the ******************.

The rest of the day went by quickly, and we went home, ate lunch then went upstairs to rest.

"M7amad shno kint taby tgool?" She asked as she sat on the couch next to me.

"Aby as2alich su2al.." I started.

"Go ahead.." She smiled.

"Shrayech tit7ajibeen?" I asked carefully.

"Hmm.. ana mfakra soon inshallah.." She replied.

"How soon is soon?" I asked her.

"Ya3ny give me a month inshallah w y9eer 5air.." She said.

"A month wayed.. ana mabeech tid5ileen il jam3a w intay moo mit7ajba.." I told her.

"M7ammad!! min wain ayeeb hdoom.. lazem aroo7 il soog ashtery.. yabeely at least a month!!" She exclaimed.

"3adee.. ana a5eth ijaza.. w awadeech ilsoog kil yoom for a week bas tit7ajibeen gabel il jam3a!!" I insisted.

"Ya3ny laish?" She asked.

"Bas.. a7ib sha3rich w maby a7ad yshoofa '3airy.." I told her.

She looked at me, and smiled.

"5ala9 okay.." She said after a while.

"ya3ny ra7 tit7ajibeen?" I asked excitedly.

"Ee inshallah!" She grinned.

"Ya ba3ad 3umry walla.. fidaitich!!" I said.

"Wai3.." She said, laughing.

"Shno wai3?" I asked, confused.

"I hate the word 'fidaitich' " She said, chuckling.

"Ya salam.. kaifeeee.. fidaitich w fadeech w afdach w ra7 afdeech 6ool 7ayaty!!" I screamed as I picked her up and swirled her around.

"Inzain.. 5ala9 kaifik.." She said as she hugged me.

"Ee 3abaly ba3ad.." I winked, and threw myself on the bed, exhausted and happy.


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Hope you enjoyed ;)

Meant to be (part thirty seven)

This one is 37.. sorry for the mix-up..
Important note: This is my blog.. so I follow my own rules here.. :)
Please people watch your language.. I don't know most of you.. and some of your comments are just Rude..
I do welcome constructive critisicm..
I don't mind if you say you don't like the post..
Bas use polite language please..
Respect is very important for me.. so If I see one more impolite comment.. the blog will be private min bacher..
w sorry I tried to ignore this, w moo awal marra w ana 6awwaft..
Bas Please respect me :)
w thank you.
w this is NOT for all of you.. sorry for those of you who had to read this w uhma 7adhum 3ajeebeeeeeeeeen :)

Dedicated to my 100th follower..


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----- M7ammad

I don't know what was going on. I don't know how long I was in bed. When I opened my eyes for the first time, I was in a white room, with my brother by my side.



----- Shai5a

Three days have passed, and I have no idea where he is or what he's doing.

His mother, father, sisters, brothers, everyone basically, would ask me about him; and I would simple shrug.

"Bl mazra3a.." I would reply, unsure.

I tried calling him, maybe 10 times in these 3 days, but he would not reply.

I was miserable.

I cried myself to sleep every night.

I waited for him, every night.

I hugged the pillow instead of him, every night.

I hated myself, every night.

I blamed myself for his weird behavior, but no matter how much I promised myself that I would be a better wife, better company, a loyal friend to him; he didn't come back, and he didn't answer his phone.

Three days, and he didn't bother to pick up or even send a message.



----- M7ammad


"Salamat!!" Fahad said, when I opened my eyes.

"Allah ysalmik.." I replied, closing my eyes again.

"Inta maynoon?!" He asked.

"Wain Shai5a?!" I asked him, ignoring his last remark.

"ib baitna maskeena.. 9arlaha 3 days '6ay3a.. ma tadry shno tsawy.." He said.

"Shlon yibtny hny?!" I asked as I rubbed my eyes.

"Mako.. umy 6arishatny ashoofik wainik.. w lamma shiftik walla 3abaly inik 5ala9 ri7t feeha.. bas ashwa iny la7agt 3aleek.." He replied.

"Inzain .. la ykoon gilt 7ag a7ad iny maree'6?" I said.

"La2.. ana ga3ed 3indik min il 9ib7.. w il7een greeb athan il ma'3reb.." He looked at his watch.

"Ee a7san.. la tgool 7ag a7ad.." I ordered.

He opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind.

"3a6ny my phone.." I told him. He handed it to me, and I signaled to him to be quiet as I dialed her number.

"Aloo.." I said when she picked up.

"M7ammad!!!" She exclaimed.

"3yoona.." I replied, smiling.

She kept quiet.

"Shlonich?!" I asked after a while.

"Inta wainik?" She asked, her voice breaking.

"I'm coming tonight.." I replied.

"Shno inta b kaifik?! You have to stay here tonight.. " Fahad interrupted.

"Inta malik sh'3l.." I silenced him, and to her I said, "I'm coming.."

She didn't reply.

"M7ammad.." She started after a while.

"Hala.." I said, feeling tired again.

She didn't reply, but within her silence I could hear sadness.

"Lamma ayee ilyoom akalmich ok?" I asked.

"Ok.." She replied quietly.

"Bye.." I said.

"Bye.." She replied, and I hung up.

"Inta w ba3dain wiyak?" I screamed at him.

"Inta ily ba3dain wiyak!! Shno taby tithba7 roo7ik!! Ma chinnick doctor!" Fahad screamed back.

"Inta malik sh'3l.. yalla roo7 nad il doctor in charge 3ashan akalma.." I told him, annoyed.

The doctor came, and we discussed the whole thing. I know I should stay one more day at least, but I promised her that I will be back tonight.

After a lot of negotiations and arguments, I convinced him to discharge me tonight after taking a couple of shots, and promising him that I will be back tomorrow.

I left the hospital, with the help of Fahad because I could barely walk, and went home.



----- Shai5a


It was already 10 pm, and he did not show up.

I should probably forget it I thought to myself, as I wished 5alti a good-night and headed to my room.



----- M7ammad


I greeted my mother and she started interrogating me about my whereabouts.
I couldn't go up the stairs, so I decided to sleep in my old room on the ground floor.

I called Shai5a, but she didn't pick up.

I called her again and again; she picked up the fourth time.

"Wainich ma tredeen?" I asked, struggling to keep my eyes open.

"W 3alaykum il salam.." She replied.

"Il salam 3aleekum.. ta3alay ta7at .. I'm in my old room.." I told her.

"I already changed into my pajamas.. inta ta3al foog.." She said.

"Ma agdar.. ta3alay yalla.." I replied.

"M7ammad.. I'm not coming.." She stated.

"Inzain.. bye.." I said as I hung up and called Fahad to help me go up.

I knocked on the door and told her to cover up because Fahad will help me in. After I was settled on the bed and Fahad left, I called out for her.

She didn't look at me, went to the other side of the bed and closed the lights.

I scooted next to her and held her hand.

"M7ammad.. aby anam.." She said coldly.

"W ana mishtaglich .. abee akalmich shway.." I told her. "I miss you so much!" I continued as I reached out for her.

"Where were you when I called?" She replied as she moved away.

"Yalla 3ad.. tara walla ta3ban.. ta3alay" I tried to convince her.

"Itha ta3ban go to your side of the bed and sleep.." she said stubbornly.

"I will always be on your side.." I told her as I kissed her shoulder.

She sighed and covered her face.

I kissed her shoulder again, and hugged her from the back.

"I didn't know married life was this stressful.." She said, a few tears escaping from her eyes.

"I'm sorry.. it doesn't have to be stressful you know.." I told her.

"Where were you? three days.. la tis2al wala tred wala chinna I'm your wife.." She replied, her voice muffled from all the tears.

I hugged her closer, feeling exhausted already.

"I was sick.. I had a virus w ma kint abeech tit3adeen.." I explained reluctantly.

"You could've told me.." She said.

"Walla ma kint adry 3an roo7y .. a9lan ilyoom fita7t 3eeny w I was in the hospital.. and I have no idea how I got there.. Fahood uhwa ily wadany.." I continued.

"You were in the hospital!!" She turned around to face me.

"Awal shay la tjableeny.." I told her.

"La2 ra7 ajablik.. kafy iny madry 3anik 3 days.." She insisted.

"Itha 9irtay maree'6a la tit7al6imeen" I said as I laughed.

"3adee.." She replied.

"Yalla liffay!!" I told her sternly, and she did quickly.

I hugged her once more as I chuckled.

"Ya3ny laish ma tgool inik maree'6 3ashan ayeeblik medicine or something.." she complained.

"la2ana I believe in the power of my immune system.. I can heal by myself.." I replied.

"You're kidding me.. 9a7?" She told me.

"Nope.. it's one of those things.. they say doctors make the worst patients.. I don't like to be a patient at all!!" I said.

"Seriously.. wow!" She said ironically.

"Inzain.. I'm tired.. let's sleep" I told her.

"We're not done yet.." She replied.

"Bacher.." I said.

"M7ammad.." She started.

"Na3am ya 7abeebat M7ammad.. shtabeen?" I yawned.

"Marra thanya la tsawy chithee.. I want to be there for you.." She told me.

"Inshallah.." I said as I squeezed her hand.

"w Salamat.." she continued.

"Allah ysalmich w y5aleech lee" I told her.

"Good night.." she replied.

"Good night.." I replied as I dozed off immediately.



----- Shai5a


I enjoyed the closeness of his body and his warm breath on my back. I closed my eyes, and drifted to sleep with a smile on my face.


_________________________________

Hope you enjoyed ;)

Meant to Be (part thirty six)

Not that long..
bas next one is soon inshallah..
and people.. I always post once a week ;p
fa ya3ny get used to that! ;p

This one is dedicated to one of my best buddies (Juju)
salamat ;**

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----- M7ammad


I woke up the next morning; I was on the couch in an extremely uncomfortable position, my legs were dangling from the side, and my neck was stiff. I looked around, and Shai5a was nowhere to be seen. I felt grumpy, tired, and there was something else wrong with my system, something I couldn't figure out with my head throbbing this way.

I went to the bathroom, did my business, then I prayed. Then I sat on the couch for a while, trying to massage my head to get rid of the head-ache. It was really cold so I went to my room to get some covers. I heard a loud thud in the kitchen so I went to look.

Shai5a was there, preparing some cheese sandwiches. She smiled when she saw me, and I attempted to return the smile.

"Good morning" She said.

I sighed as I took a seat and covered my face with my hands.

"Shfeek?" She asked concerned.

"Nothing.." I replied.

"9ij.. M7ammad shfeek?" she asked again as she came closer.

"Bas headache.." I said.

"Salamat.. do you need tea, coffee, panadol?" She asked as she sat next to me.

"No.." I told her.

"Akeed?" She said, concerned.

I nodded and grabbed a sandwich from the table. I ate a couple of bites, but I felt sick so I didn't finish it.

"We're going back today.." I said.

"Ok.." She replied.

"I think I'll have someone come and pick you up.. I might stay a couple more days.." I continued.

"M7ammad.. what's wrong?" She insisted.

"Nothing!" I said crossly, as I went to my bedroom. I called the driver, and told him to come pick her up.

I closed my eyes, and I felt like a huge weight was placed on my chest. I couldn't breathe, I was tired.

She knocked the door, but I couldn't reply, I couldn't talk.

She came in, but I couldn't open my eyes to look at her, and I can feel her sitting beside me.

She tried calling my name, but she left after several attempts.



----- Shai5a


There is something wrong with him.

Za3lan minny? Bas ana ma saweet shay!

I paced in front of his room for a couple of minutes, and decided to wait until he wakes up.

I heard his phone ring a couple of times, but he didn't pick up. I peeked inside, but he was still asleep in the same position.

After a little while, my phone rang.

5alti, m7ammad's mother, was calling.

She said that the driver was outside, and that M7ammad was not picking up his phone for some reason.

I told her he was sleeping and that I will be back with the driver.

"Laish tredeen wiya il sayeg? Laish moo wiya M7ammad?" She asked.

"La2ana ana 3ndy sh'3l w uhwa yaby yig3ad cham yoom.." I replied, not sure what to say really.



----- M7ammad


I forced myself to pick up after a while, the driver was still calling.

"Raju.. mno ma3ak?" I asked him tiredly.

"Mako a7ad baba.." He replied.

"Laish moo yayeb wiyak Kumary?" I managed to ask.

"Inta mafy gool.." He said, scared.

Ma y9eer tred wiya il sayeg broo7ha I thought to myself.

"Yalla roo7 yeebha w ta3al 3ashan ta5thoon mama!" I said.

"Mama bl bait.." He told me.

"Rajuuuu!! Roo7.. w ta3al i5ith Shai5a bser3a!!" I replied.

"Inshallah baba.." He said quickly and hung up.

I tried to get up, but I couldn't. It was probably a one day thing I thought to myself as I covered myself.




----- Shai5a


I walked around, and I would check up on him every 15 minutes but he was still asleep.

I don't get him, I really don't, I thought to myself


_________________________________

Hope you enjoyed..
CLiff-hanger?! ;p

Meant to Be (Part thirty-five)

Hello ;)
The post was ready ams.. bas our internet was down..
Enjoy :D
This one is dedicated to Dr. 7awoora ;)
and to all the commenters and readers..

_____________________________________






----- M7ammad


It was dark outside, and we sat on one of the benches.

"Tara we're going to sleep outside today" I told her.

"Ok.. bas it's kind of hot here" She replied.

"3adee.. we'll have the fan working if it gets really hot" I said.

"Ok.. let's play truth or dare" She said excitedly.

"Fine.. you ask first .." I told her.

"No.. you ask first.. a9lan you don't even ask questions, you always copy my questions.. it's not fair!" She complained.

"Fine.. you want me to ask ya3ny?" I challenged her.

"Yup.." She replied, certain.

"Truth or dare?" I said laughing.

"Truth" She told me.

"Do you love me?" I asked, not missing a beat.

Her eyes, honey colored, rimmed with a dark, chocolate-brown shade, now widened in disbelief. She stared at me, and a blush started to find its way to her cheeks.

"You can't ask these kinds of questions!" She said.

"Laish inshallah?" I replied.

"Because you just can't!" She insisted.

"Yes, I can.." I told her.

"No.. M7ammad seriously.. you can't" She exclaimed.

"Fine.. I'll change the question alright?" I said.

"Ok.." She sighed, feeling relieved.

"How much do you love me?" I asked, smiling smugly.

Her face turned into deeper shades of red, as she huffed.

"Fine.. I don't want a truth 3ayal.. I want a dare.." She said.

"No.. you already said truth" I told her.

"And I want to change now!" She insisted again.

"Mit2akda?" I asked her.

"Yes!" She smiled, victoriously.

"I want you to dance like Shakira.. and you can put music if you want!" I told her.

"Ok that's it.. I'm not playing with you.." She declared as she got up.

I laughed as I caught her before she left.

"Wain inshallah? You can't just quit the game you know.." I said.

"Watch me.." She replied as she tried to free her hand from my grip.

"If you're not going to play fairly, don't play at all" I told her.

"Inta ma t3arf t6ale3 as2ila.." She replied, annoyed.

"Shayfatny intay.. tis2al what's your favorite color, your favorite food, your favorite computer, your favorite shoe, w ba3dain ya3ny... as2iltich intay malee8a.. my questions rock, honey" I stated coolly.

"Whatever.. let go of my hand.." She said, rolling her eyes.

"No way.. you can't just go about breaking all the rules and expect to just get away with it!" I exclaimed.

"Now what ya3ny?" She asked.

"Now is payback time sweetie.." I said.

"And what is payback exactly?" She asked, still trying to free her hands.

"Five minutes.." I replied.

"Five minutes of what?" She asked, looking at me.

"Of this.." I said as I kissed her, not waiting for her answer. It was gentle at first, I waited for her to get accommodated to my touch, then it was a bit more than the usual.

Her breathing was a bit uneven, so I stopped.

She looked at me, her expression dazed, her eyes had a new shine to them.

"I think you have two more minutes.." She stated with a slight smile.

"I think I have ten.." I said as I closed the gap between us once more.



----- Shai5a


Somehow, I was lying on my back and he was hovering on top of me. I held his hand and tried to stop mine from shaking.

"You're not ready.. it's ok" He said as he sat down and helped me up.

"I'm.. I'm.. I'm just.." I tried to say something, to say I'm sorry, but I couldn't.

"No its fine.. just breathe.." He ordered as he rubbed my back.

"I.." I started.

"I'm going to take a quick shower.." He said as he got up.

I searched for my phone, and called my best friend. I think I might need some advice after all.

"A7isa mit'6ayig" I told her miserably.

"Do you love him?" She asked after I told her what happened.

"Why are you asking me this question.. shfeekum 3ala hal as2ila il sa5eefa ilyoom!!" I screamed.

"Just answer me.." She replied calmly.

"Madry.. maybe.. it's too soon to tell.." I replied nervously.

"Are you happy with him?" She asked.

"Yes.." I said, smiling.

"Do you miss him when he's not around?" She asked this time.

"Well, we have been together for almost two months and there hasn't been a day where I didn't see him, so I didn't have the chance to experience that.." I answered.

"So, you want to have a day where there is no him?" She continued.

"No.. why would I want that!" I said.

"Do you enjoy talking to him?" She asked.

"I do.. he's understanding most of the time.. when he's not being silly at least" I answered, laughing.

"When you think about your future, is he a part of it?" She continued her interrogation.

"Well, of course ya3ny.. he's my husband!" I exclaimed.

"Are you two smiling, in your imagination, is it a happy future?" She asked.

"Yes, it is.. why wouldn't it be?" I said.

"What do you feel when you look into his eyes?" She ignored my question.

"Unbelievable.. its magic.. something else.." I tried to explain, but failed.

I only succeeded in getting the butterflies in my stomach in havoc, just by recalling his eyes.

"Go on.." She urged.

"Madry walla.. it's just that his eyes are beautiful.. I've never seen eyes so deep before.." I continued.

"Oh sure.. it has nothing to do with the fact that you are in fact falling for him!" She insisted.

"I am not!" I told her.

"Ok then.. why did you not answer his question.. why didn't you tell him: no, I hate you M7ammad" She asked.

"I do not hate him!!!!" I said.

"Then what's the feeling called.. when you don't hate someone?" She pushed.

"It's called being neutral.. just liking them.." I told her.

"Ok.. then you wouldn't mind if he looked around for someone that loves him, would you?" She said.

"WHAT! Of course I do, he's my husband!!" I screamed.

"So you're claiming him yours, but in the same time you don't want to admit that you have feelings for him?" She asked.

"He is mine.. he's my husband whether he likes it or not!" I stated.

"Do you like it?" She asked.

"I do.." I said, after a while.

"You love him.." She declared.

"I do not.." I said, not so sure myself.

"Then describe your feelings towards him.." She insisted.

"Madreeeeeee.. walla madry!!" I said.

"That's just denial.. because you are falling for him.. slowly.. just admit it, you're falling for him.." She screamed, happily.

"Ok.. fine.. I think I am falling for him.. slowly" I replied.

"Wonderful.. my work here is done .. go tell him.." She said.

"Ok.. thank you.. I love you!" I told her.

"You love him.." She stated once more.

"Bye.." I said, laughing.

I think the whole conversation took about an hour. But M7ammad still didn't come out. I went inside, looking for him, and there he was sitting on one of the couches, watching TV.



----- M7ammad


"Hey.." She smiled, as she sat beside me.

"Hey yourself.." I smiled back as I wrapped my arms around her.

"Kil hatha shower?" She asked, laughing.

" I went outside to check on you and you were talking on the phone, so I came here because I didn't want to bother you.." I told her.

"Yeah.. I was talking to my best friend.." She said, smiling.

"Some serious business you two were talking about.. you were so engrossed, you didn't even notice me coming" I joked.

"Yeah.. just catching up.." She said as she laughed.

"Soo.. shlonich ba3ad?" I asked, playing with her hair.

"You know.. I .. I think I might me falling for you.. maybe.. bas I don't really know if it's love yet.. I mean it's too soon right? Madree.. Bas I do have feelings for you I think.. Madree.." She said, nervously, as she kept her eyes on the TV.

"I am not asking for anything more.." I said as I kissed her forehead.

I let my lips linger for a while, before looking at her. She was smiling, satisfied, happy.


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Hope you enjoyed ;)