One last time?

Dedicated to H..


____________________________







I'm going to miss you.. akeed you'll ask why now?! why are you telling me this now?! well.. la2ana 5ala9 I'm going to block all your memories and delete you out of my life, my brain, maybe my heart too .. I loved you with my all .. bas 5ala9.. maleeeeeeeet.. it's hard .. it's painful.. it's confusing.. you make me feel 10 years older .. and at times you can make me feel 10 years younger ba3ad .. I wish I can have closure.. with you it's not possible.. damn it what am I saying .. what am I trying to do? I still love you.. I will love you for the rest of my life .. bas it's not meant to be.. It's not like we had anything.. it was a figment of my imagination based on thin strings that are almost invisible to the people around us.. but I saw them.. for some reason I saw them.. they were like the light at the end of the tunnel.. they were all my hopes and dreams.. they were everything .. and nothing in the same time.. I wish I can hate you .. I wish I can despise you instead of all the love I carry around for you.. sometimes your love is like a burden.. it gets so heavy.. it's almost impossible to carry.. but impossible to get rid of in the same time.. I have no idea why I'm so attached to you.. to the idea of you there forever and ever.. I love you I would repeat in my head.. I love you I would plead every single night.. I love you I would beg every single shooting star.. I love you I would cry helplessly over and over .. I love you.. I'm sick of those three beautiful words.. I wish you would wake up and realize that I am right here.. waiting for you to look up.. waiting for your eyes to smile with acknowledgment.. but you refuse to do that.. you refuse to be the reason for my happiness.. you refuse to let me in your life.. but what you don't know is that only the thought of you makes me get up in the morning.. the idea of having you close to me one day is the only reason I smile.. You are in every breath I take.. Your smile is reflected on every drop of water.. No matter how much you tried to deprive me from yourself.. I loved you more and more.. you fought me back with all your strength.. all you wanted to prove is that you are not the one for me.. but you were all along.. you still are.. and you will be for the rest of my being.. I'm tired of fighting for you.. you can have it your way if that's what you want.. if you want us to stay apart for the rest of our lives then you can have that.. if all you care about is for your path never to cross mine then you can have that too.. if you don't want me to know anything about you.. then I want you to know that you're being too harsh on me .. you're asking too much.. but I'm willing to give you even that.. I'm saying good-bye now and forever .. I want you to know that no farewell is ever going to be enough for me.. you were my strength one day.. and today you are my only weakness.. I love you one last time I will whisper to the darkness.. I love you..



It's hard to mourn over something you had.. but it's even harder to mourn over something you never had..

Meant to Be (Part 38)

This post is dedicated to Unchained Melody and Mrs. Chuck Bass...
and I think it's the longest I ever wrote!!

and my email is
shushuxd@gmail.com


______________________________







----- m7ammad


Days passed and I got better. I had to go to work, b mustashfa il 3adan. Things were getting better between me and Shai5a.

"M7ammad.. aby aroo7 wiyak il dawam bacher.." She said one night.

"5air inshallah.." I told her as I hugged her and closed my eyes.

"M7ammad.. min 9ijy!!" She stated.

"Shno ya3ny tyeen wiyay il dawam?" I replied sleepily.

"Ya3ny il 9ib7 lamma agoom 3ashan atrayag wiyak.. ma ared dary w ag3ad bidoon sh'3l.. aroo7 wiyak instead.." She said.

"La2.." I told her simply.

"Laish la2?!" She asked.

"Bas.." I replied, not in the mood for discussing anything now.

"M7ammad.. ma y9eer chithy.. tgawimny il 9ib7 mbacher w ana ma 3ndy shay asawy.. w ma tir'6a aroo7 ashte'3el wala mukan.. w ga3da bl bait.. w malal.. w aby ayee wiyak!!" She complained.

"Ya3ny lee hal daraja t7ibeeny? Ma tigdereen tig3ideen bidoony wala digeega?" I teased her, hoping that it would make her stay quiet.

"Eee eee.. lee hal daraja a7ibik!!" She said to my surprise.

I opened one eye to look at her, and she was pouting and in no state to sleep. I laughed at I sat up and opened the lights.

"Intay shaklich moo nawya tnameen.." I yawned.

"Ee ma ra7 anam leeman tir'6a ta5ithny wiyak.." She sat up too.

" No way.." I shook my head.

"EE laish ya3ny??!" She asked, and she moved so she could face me.

"La2ana dawamy kila riyayeel w looya w ma abeech tit3ibeen wiyay.." I replied.

"M7ammad.. it's a hospital.. akeed ra7 ykoon feeha riyayeel w looya.. besides I want to stay in your room and see your patients.." She said stubbornly.

"Is this argument going to go on forever?" I laughed at her serious facial expressions.

"It will end as soon as you say 'yes' " She urged.

"Give me one good reason.." I told her.

"Because it's my dream.. to be a doctor.. and since I can't be one.. then please I just want to pretend to be one for one day only.." She held my squeezed my hands, and looked at me with her beautiful brown eyes compelling me to say yes.

"W mno gal you can't be a doctor?" I asked.

"Ubooy.." She said as she looked away.

"Bas ana il mas2ool 3anich il7een moo ubooch.." I told her.

"Hatha moo maw'6oo3na il7een.." She told me, blinking away the tears.

"3ayal shno maw'6oo3na?" I teased her.

"Wala shay .." She sighed and lied down avoiding eye contact.

"Ya3ny za3lana?" I asked as I peeked in her face.

"la2.. bas ti3abt w banam.." She said as she moved further away.

"Shda3wa ti3abtay.. 3ayal bacher shlon ra7 t9eereen doctor?" I asked her, moving closer.

"M7ammad.. bas maly 5ulg atna8ash.." She closed her eyes tightly.

"Ana ma aby atna8ash.. ana agool goomay 6al3ay hdoomich 7ag bacher 3ashan ma t2a5reeny il 9ib7.." I kissed her shoulder.

"Ya3ny ra7 ta5ithny??" She asked hesitantly.

"Ee ra7 a5thich wiyay.. bas la tit3awideen.." I laughed.

"Gool walla!!" She sat up excitedly.

"Shno li3ba .. ana gitlich shay ya3ny 5ala9.." I told her.

"Omg!! Thank youuuuuu.." She screamed as she jumped out of bed and ran to her closet.

I followed her and watched as she threw a couple of garments on the chair.

"6ayartay ilnoom min 3ainy.." I complained.

"Ay outfit a7san?!" She ignored my remark.

"Madry.. why does it matter anyways.." I said as I sat on the other chair.

"Are you seriously asking me this question?" She rolled her eyes.

"Ok.. I have a suggestion for you.." I said as I got up and dug into my closet to find the scrubs that I got a while ago. They were small but I didn't have time to return them. "There.." I said as I held them up when I found them.

"Brilliant.." She threw the black pants on the floor and took the scrubs from me carefully.

"You like?" I asked her, grinning.

"I love.." She smiled excitedly. "I'm going to try them on.." She said, running to the bathroom.

I rolled my eyes and waited for her. She opened the door after a while and peeked.

"This is too amazing!!" She said, stepping out. "A little too big though.." She continued.

The shirt was sort of baggy and it reached almost mid-thigh and the sleeves reached her elbows. The pants were a bit long.

"Awal shay.. you need a pin here.." I said pointing to the waistline. "Thany shay.. you look hot.." I winked.

"I am sooooo excited.. walla M7ammad .. thank you soooo much!!" She blabbered.

"Inzain.. yalla we need a good night sleep 3ashan you can rock the hospital tomorrow.." I told her as I went to bed.

"Ok.. I'm going to change and sleep.." She said as she went to the bathroom again.

I was too sleepy so I didn't bother to open my eyes when she came to bed, all I did was hug her when she came closer.

She mumbled something and we both drifted to sleep.



----- Shai5a


I woke up extra early the next morning, I don't think I slept properly a9lan. I took a shower, got dressed, and then woke M7ammad up.

I prepared quick breakfast as he took a shower and we left to work after breakfast. The ride to the hospital was quiet; I was too excited and he was sleepy as usual.
I sat next to him and pretended to be his assistant for the day. He rescheduled his surgeries because, according to him, there is no way I will be allowed in the operating room.

"Il7een my break.. ana baroo7 ayeebly something to drink.. and you stay here .. do you want anything?" he asked as he got up.

"water please.." I said as I smiled.

I sat on his chair and waited patiently for him to come back. I wanted to ask him about some of the cases and I didn't have a chance to do so earlier.

The door opened, and a really tall woman came in. I looked at her and smiled.

She frowned as she checked the room number and looked at me again.

"Dr. M7ammad will come back ba3ad shway.." I told her.

"Aha.. w intay mno?" She asked eyeing me.

"Ana.." I started, but stopped as he came inside the room.

"M7ammad!! There you are.." She beamed when she saw him.

She was almost as tall as him, I noticed. And she had a killer figure too. She's annoying me already I thought to myself.

"Oh.. hey there.." he replied as he came and sat next to me.

"Ma shiftik ilyoom.. fa gelt ayee ashoof shfeek.." she said as she glanced my way.

"Tislimeen.. ma feeny shay 3adee.." He told her.

"Ahaa.. w mno hathy?" She asked as she pointed at me.

3yoony 6la3at min mukanha when she said that. She talks as if I was an intruder or someone she hates.

He introduced us to each other. I was simply "Shai5a" not his wife or anything, and she was "Dr. Dana" and of course she didn't like the formal name, instead she wants him to call her "Dana" or maybe "Dandoon" she laughed.

I smiled politely even though I was burning from the inside.
She sat down and took off her coat, as if it was the most normal, routinic thing she ever did.

She talked to M7ammad mostly, actually all of the time. She would glance my way, in the most despicable manner and engage herself with M7ammad.

Thankfully, his break was over soon, and her cue was an elderly patient that knocked the door and entered tiredly.

He smiled at me sensing my discomfort, and I kept quiet and smiled at the old man in front of me.

Who was she anyways to barge in and talk to him like he was her best friend. I mean if she was his best friend, then why didn't he bother to tell me about her sooner. And why does it have to be her with those extremely long legs? And why can't she at least be polite to me?

I sighed as the patient left, and M7ammad went outside for a couple of seconds then locked the door on his way in.

"Shfeech?" He asked with a smile.

"Ma feeny shay" I replied coldly.

"3ayal laish mazajich ti'3ayar min awal ma d5alat Dana?" He asked again.

"Mno Dana? Gool Dandoon a7san.." I stared at him with my eyebrows raised.

He laughed out loud, and I got up but he caught my hand, still laughing.

"mako shay y'6a7ek tara.." I told him.

"Ya3ny intay m3a9ba 3ashan Dandoon il7een?" He asked, trying but failing to sound serious.

"Hid eedy M7ammad.." I said, feeling the anger rise when he called her Dandoon.

"5ala9 5ala9.. I'm sorry.." He looked at me sincerely.

"a9lan mno hathy?" I asked.

"Dandoon.. a89id Dr. Dana.." He said.

I stared at him for a while before deciding to let it go.

"W mno Dr. Dana inshallah?" I continued.

"Wa7da.. kil yoom tig3ad tsoolef wiyay.. my friends hate her and.." He started.

"walla ma aloomhum.." I interrupted him.

"and apparently so does my wife then.." He laughed.

"W why did you forget to mention that I'm your wife?" I fumed.

"La2ana mamnoooooooo3 .. ma y9eer intay tkooneen hny a9lan.. this is a hospital not a hotel.. w loo ana ma a3arf il mudeer w amoon 3alee chan ma ri'6a.." He explained.

I looked at him to check if he was saying the truth, and he looked sincere I concluded.

Someone tried the door and then knocked it.

"Leel7een za3lana?" He asked.

"Open the door.." I ignored his question.

"ma ra7 afta7 until you say 'no' " He laughed.

"M7ammad.." I pointed at the door.

"La2.. yalla goolay moo za3lana 3ashan afta7.. ti5ayilay a patient is in dire need now w intay ily m3a6lita!!" he said.

"Fine.. moo za3lana.. go open the door.." I said, smiling in spite of myself.

He blew me a kiss as he went to open the door, and a young guy entered with him.



----- M7ammad


After I examined him, I started writing the prescription after assuring him that nothing serious is going on.

I looked at him after finishing everything but he was too busy looking at something behind me. I looked around and there was Shai5a with her long hair strewn all over her back. She bent to pick up the elastic to adjust her hair into a ponytail once more.

I called his name angrily, gave him his paper and he left; of course not without casting another long glance on Shai5a.

She sat next to me again.

"Aby akalmich b maw'6oo3 lama nred il bait.." I told her trying to stop myself from running after the guy and punching him.

"Shfeek?" She asked concerned.

"Wala shay.." I said, gritting my teeth.

Another patient came in just in time, to take my mind off the ******************.

The rest of the day went by quickly, and we went home, ate lunch then went upstairs to rest.

"M7amad shno kint taby tgool?" She asked as she sat on the couch next to me.

"Aby as2alich su2al.." I started.

"Go ahead.." She smiled.

"Shrayech tit7ajibeen?" I asked carefully.

"Hmm.. ana mfakra soon inshallah.." She replied.

"How soon is soon?" I asked her.

"Ya3ny give me a month inshallah w y9eer 5air.." She said.

"A month wayed.. ana mabeech tid5ileen il jam3a w intay moo mit7ajba.." I told her.

"M7ammad!! min wain ayeeb hdoom.. lazem aroo7 il soog ashtery.. yabeely at least a month!!" She exclaimed.

"3adee.. ana a5eth ijaza.. w awadeech ilsoog kil yoom for a week bas tit7ajibeen gabel il jam3a!!" I insisted.

"Ya3ny laish?" She asked.

"Bas.. a7ib sha3rich w maby a7ad yshoofa '3airy.." I told her.

She looked at me, and smiled.

"5ala9 okay.." She said after a while.

"ya3ny ra7 tit7ajibeen?" I asked excitedly.

"Ee inshallah!" She grinned.

"Ya ba3ad 3umry walla.. fidaitich!!" I said.

"Wai3.." She said, laughing.

"Shno wai3?" I asked, confused.

"I hate the word 'fidaitich' " She said, chuckling.

"Ya salam.. kaifeeee.. fidaitich w fadeech w afdach w ra7 afdeech 6ool 7ayaty!!" I screamed as I picked her up and swirled her around.

"Inzain.. 5ala9 kaifik.." She said as she hugged me.

"Ee 3abaly ba3ad.." I winked, and threw myself on the bed, exhausted and happy.


______________________________________


Hope you enjoyed ;)

Meant to be (part thirty seven)

This one is 37.. sorry for the mix-up..
Important note: This is my blog.. so I follow my own rules here.. :)
Please people watch your language.. I don't know most of you.. and some of your comments are just Rude..
I do welcome constructive critisicm..
I don't mind if you say you don't like the post..
Bas use polite language please..
Respect is very important for me.. so If I see one more impolite comment.. the blog will be private min bacher..
w sorry I tried to ignore this, w moo awal marra w ana 6awwaft..
Bas Please respect me :)
w thank you.
w this is NOT for all of you.. sorry for those of you who had to read this w uhma 7adhum 3ajeebeeeeeeeeen :)

Dedicated to my 100th follower..


_________________________________







----- M7ammad

I don't know what was going on. I don't know how long I was in bed. When I opened my eyes for the first time, I was in a white room, with my brother by my side.



----- Shai5a

Three days have passed, and I have no idea where he is or what he's doing.

His mother, father, sisters, brothers, everyone basically, would ask me about him; and I would simple shrug.

"Bl mazra3a.." I would reply, unsure.

I tried calling him, maybe 10 times in these 3 days, but he would not reply.

I was miserable.

I cried myself to sleep every night.

I waited for him, every night.

I hugged the pillow instead of him, every night.

I hated myself, every night.

I blamed myself for his weird behavior, but no matter how much I promised myself that I would be a better wife, better company, a loyal friend to him; he didn't come back, and he didn't answer his phone.

Three days, and he didn't bother to pick up or even send a message.



----- M7ammad


"Salamat!!" Fahad said, when I opened my eyes.

"Allah ysalmik.." I replied, closing my eyes again.

"Inta maynoon?!" He asked.

"Wain Shai5a?!" I asked him, ignoring his last remark.

"ib baitna maskeena.. 9arlaha 3 days '6ay3a.. ma tadry shno tsawy.." He said.

"Shlon yibtny hny?!" I asked as I rubbed my eyes.

"Mako.. umy 6arishatny ashoofik wainik.. w lamma shiftik walla 3abaly inik 5ala9 ri7t feeha.. bas ashwa iny la7agt 3aleek.." He replied.

"Inzain .. la ykoon gilt 7ag a7ad iny maree'6?" I said.

"La2.. ana ga3ed 3indik min il 9ib7.. w il7een greeb athan il ma'3reb.." He looked at his watch.

"Ee a7san.. la tgool 7ag a7ad.." I ordered.

He opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind.

"3a6ny my phone.." I told him. He handed it to me, and I signaled to him to be quiet as I dialed her number.

"Aloo.." I said when she picked up.

"M7ammad!!!" She exclaimed.

"3yoona.." I replied, smiling.

She kept quiet.

"Shlonich?!" I asked after a while.

"Inta wainik?" She asked, her voice breaking.

"I'm coming tonight.." I replied.

"Shno inta b kaifik?! You have to stay here tonight.. " Fahad interrupted.

"Inta malik sh'3l.." I silenced him, and to her I said, "I'm coming.."

She didn't reply.

"M7ammad.." She started after a while.

"Hala.." I said, feeling tired again.

She didn't reply, but within her silence I could hear sadness.

"Lamma ayee ilyoom akalmich ok?" I asked.

"Ok.." She replied quietly.

"Bye.." I said.

"Bye.." She replied, and I hung up.

"Inta w ba3dain wiyak?" I screamed at him.

"Inta ily ba3dain wiyak!! Shno taby tithba7 roo7ik!! Ma chinnick doctor!" Fahad screamed back.

"Inta malik sh'3l.. yalla roo7 nad il doctor in charge 3ashan akalma.." I told him, annoyed.

The doctor came, and we discussed the whole thing. I know I should stay one more day at least, but I promised her that I will be back tonight.

After a lot of negotiations and arguments, I convinced him to discharge me tonight after taking a couple of shots, and promising him that I will be back tomorrow.

I left the hospital, with the help of Fahad because I could barely walk, and went home.



----- Shai5a


It was already 10 pm, and he did not show up.

I should probably forget it I thought to myself, as I wished 5alti a good-night and headed to my room.



----- M7ammad


I greeted my mother and she started interrogating me about my whereabouts.
I couldn't go up the stairs, so I decided to sleep in my old room on the ground floor.

I called Shai5a, but she didn't pick up.

I called her again and again; she picked up the fourth time.

"Wainich ma tredeen?" I asked, struggling to keep my eyes open.

"W 3alaykum il salam.." She replied.

"Il salam 3aleekum.. ta3alay ta7at .. I'm in my old room.." I told her.

"I already changed into my pajamas.. inta ta3al foog.." She said.

"Ma agdar.. ta3alay yalla.." I replied.

"M7ammad.. I'm not coming.." She stated.

"Inzain.. bye.." I said as I hung up and called Fahad to help me go up.

I knocked on the door and told her to cover up because Fahad will help me in. After I was settled on the bed and Fahad left, I called out for her.

She didn't look at me, went to the other side of the bed and closed the lights.

I scooted next to her and held her hand.

"M7ammad.. aby anam.." She said coldly.

"W ana mishtaglich .. abee akalmich shway.." I told her. "I miss you so much!" I continued as I reached out for her.

"Where were you when I called?" She replied as she moved away.

"Yalla 3ad.. tara walla ta3ban.. ta3alay" I tried to convince her.

"Itha ta3ban go to your side of the bed and sleep.." she said stubbornly.

"I will always be on your side.." I told her as I kissed her shoulder.

She sighed and covered her face.

I kissed her shoulder again, and hugged her from the back.

"I didn't know married life was this stressful.." She said, a few tears escaping from her eyes.

"I'm sorry.. it doesn't have to be stressful you know.." I told her.

"Where were you? three days.. la tis2al wala tred wala chinna I'm your wife.." She replied, her voice muffled from all the tears.

I hugged her closer, feeling exhausted already.

"I was sick.. I had a virus w ma kint abeech tit3adeen.." I explained reluctantly.

"You could've told me.." She said.

"Walla ma kint adry 3an roo7y .. a9lan ilyoom fita7t 3eeny w I was in the hospital.. and I have no idea how I got there.. Fahood uhwa ily wadany.." I continued.

"You were in the hospital!!" She turned around to face me.

"Awal shay la tjableeny.." I told her.

"La2 ra7 ajablik.. kafy iny madry 3anik 3 days.." She insisted.

"Itha 9irtay maree'6a la tit7al6imeen" I said as I laughed.

"3adee.." She replied.

"Yalla liffay!!" I told her sternly, and she did quickly.

I hugged her once more as I chuckled.

"Ya3ny laish ma tgool inik maree'6 3ashan ayeeblik medicine or something.." she complained.

"la2ana I believe in the power of my immune system.. I can heal by myself.." I replied.

"You're kidding me.. 9a7?" She told me.

"Nope.. it's one of those things.. they say doctors make the worst patients.. I don't like to be a patient at all!!" I said.

"Seriously.. wow!" She said ironically.

"Inzain.. I'm tired.. let's sleep" I told her.

"We're not done yet.." She replied.

"Bacher.." I said.

"M7ammad.." She started.

"Na3am ya 7abeebat M7ammad.. shtabeen?" I yawned.

"Marra thanya la tsawy chithee.. I want to be there for you.." She told me.

"Inshallah.." I said as I squeezed her hand.

"w Salamat.." she continued.

"Allah ysalmich w y5aleech lee" I told her.

"Good night.." she replied.

"Good night.." I replied as I dozed off immediately.



----- Shai5a


I enjoyed the closeness of his body and his warm breath on my back. I closed my eyes, and drifted to sleep with a smile on my face.


_________________________________

Hope you enjoyed ;)

Meant to Be (part thirty six)

Not that long..
bas next one is soon inshallah..
and people.. I always post once a week ;p
fa ya3ny get used to that! ;p

This one is dedicated to one of my best buddies (Juju)
salamat ;**

____________________________________






----- M7ammad


I woke up the next morning; I was on the couch in an extremely uncomfortable position, my legs were dangling from the side, and my neck was stiff. I looked around, and Shai5a was nowhere to be seen. I felt grumpy, tired, and there was something else wrong with my system, something I couldn't figure out with my head throbbing this way.

I went to the bathroom, did my business, then I prayed. Then I sat on the couch for a while, trying to massage my head to get rid of the head-ache. It was really cold so I went to my room to get some covers. I heard a loud thud in the kitchen so I went to look.

Shai5a was there, preparing some cheese sandwiches. She smiled when she saw me, and I attempted to return the smile.

"Good morning" She said.

I sighed as I took a seat and covered my face with my hands.

"Shfeek?" She asked concerned.

"Nothing.." I replied.

"9ij.. M7ammad shfeek?" she asked again as she came closer.

"Bas headache.." I said.

"Salamat.. do you need tea, coffee, panadol?" She asked as she sat next to me.

"No.." I told her.

"Akeed?" She said, concerned.

I nodded and grabbed a sandwich from the table. I ate a couple of bites, but I felt sick so I didn't finish it.

"We're going back today.." I said.

"Ok.." She replied.

"I think I'll have someone come and pick you up.. I might stay a couple more days.." I continued.

"M7ammad.. what's wrong?" She insisted.

"Nothing!" I said crossly, as I went to my bedroom. I called the driver, and told him to come pick her up.

I closed my eyes, and I felt like a huge weight was placed on my chest. I couldn't breathe, I was tired.

She knocked the door, but I couldn't reply, I couldn't talk.

She came in, but I couldn't open my eyes to look at her, and I can feel her sitting beside me.

She tried calling my name, but she left after several attempts.



----- Shai5a


There is something wrong with him.

Za3lan minny? Bas ana ma saweet shay!

I paced in front of his room for a couple of minutes, and decided to wait until he wakes up.

I heard his phone ring a couple of times, but he didn't pick up. I peeked inside, but he was still asleep in the same position.

After a little while, my phone rang.

5alti, m7ammad's mother, was calling.

She said that the driver was outside, and that M7ammad was not picking up his phone for some reason.

I told her he was sleeping and that I will be back with the driver.

"Laish tredeen wiya il sayeg? Laish moo wiya M7ammad?" She asked.

"La2ana ana 3ndy sh'3l w uhwa yaby yig3ad cham yoom.." I replied, not sure what to say really.



----- M7ammad


I forced myself to pick up after a while, the driver was still calling.

"Raju.. mno ma3ak?" I asked him tiredly.

"Mako a7ad baba.." He replied.

"Laish moo yayeb wiyak Kumary?" I managed to ask.

"Inta mafy gool.." He said, scared.

Ma y9eer tred wiya il sayeg broo7ha I thought to myself.

"Yalla roo7 yeebha w ta3al 3ashan ta5thoon mama!" I said.

"Mama bl bait.." He told me.

"Rajuuuu!! Roo7.. w ta3al i5ith Shai5a bser3a!!" I replied.

"Inshallah baba.." He said quickly and hung up.

I tried to get up, but I couldn't. It was probably a one day thing I thought to myself as I covered myself.




----- Shai5a


I walked around, and I would check up on him every 15 minutes but he was still asleep.

I don't get him, I really don't, I thought to myself


_________________________________

Hope you enjoyed..
CLiff-hanger?! ;p

Meant to Be (Part thirty-five)

Hello ;)
The post was ready ams.. bas our internet was down..
Enjoy :D
This one is dedicated to Dr. 7awoora ;)
and to all the commenters and readers..

_____________________________________






----- M7ammad


It was dark outside, and we sat on one of the benches.

"Tara we're going to sleep outside today" I told her.

"Ok.. bas it's kind of hot here" She replied.

"3adee.. we'll have the fan working if it gets really hot" I said.

"Ok.. let's play truth or dare" She said excitedly.

"Fine.. you ask first .." I told her.

"No.. you ask first.. a9lan you don't even ask questions, you always copy my questions.. it's not fair!" She complained.

"Fine.. you want me to ask ya3ny?" I challenged her.

"Yup.." She replied, certain.

"Truth or dare?" I said laughing.

"Truth" She told me.

"Do you love me?" I asked, not missing a beat.

Her eyes, honey colored, rimmed with a dark, chocolate-brown shade, now widened in disbelief. She stared at me, and a blush started to find its way to her cheeks.

"You can't ask these kinds of questions!" She said.

"Laish inshallah?" I replied.

"Because you just can't!" She insisted.

"Yes, I can.." I told her.

"No.. M7ammad seriously.. you can't" She exclaimed.

"Fine.. I'll change the question alright?" I said.

"Ok.." She sighed, feeling relieved.

"How much do you love me?" I asked, smiling smugly.

Her face turned into deeper shades of red, as she huffed.

"Fine.. I don't want a truth 3ayal.. I want a dare.." She said.

"No.. you already said truth" I told her.

"And I want to change now!" She insisted again.

"Mit2akda?" I asked her.

"Yes!" She smiled, victoriously.

"I want you to dance like Shakira.. and you can put music if you want!" I told her.

"Ok that's it.. I'm not playing with you.." She declared as she got up.

I laughed as I caught her before she left.

"Wain inshallah? You can't just quit the game you know.." I said.

"Watch me.." She replied as she tried to free her hand from my grip.

"If you're not going to play fairly, don't play at all" I told her.

"Inta ma t3arf t6ale3 as2ila.." She replied, annoyed.

"Shayfatny intay.. tis2al what's your favorite color, your favorite food, your favorite computer, your favorite shoe, w ba3dain ya3ny... as2iltich intay malee8a.. my questions rock, honey" I stated coolly.

"Whatever.. let go of my hand.." She said, rolling her eyes.

"No way.. you can't just go about breaking all the rules and expect to just get away with it!" I exclaimed.

"Now what ya3ny?" She asked.

"Now is payback time sweetie.." I said.

"And what is payback exactly?" She asked, still trying to free her hands.

"Five minutes.." I replied.

"Five minutes of what?" She asked, looking at me.

"Of this.." I said as I kissed her, not waiting for her answer. It was gentle at first, I waited for her to get accommodated to my touch, then it was a bit more than the usual.

Her breathing was a bit uneven, so I stopped.

She looked at me, her expression dazed, her eyes had a new shine to them.

"I think you have two more minutes.." She stated with a slight smile.

"I think I have ten.." I said as I closed the gap between us once more.



----- Shai5a


Somehow, I was lying on my back and he was hovering on top of me. I held his hand and tried to stop mine from shaking.

"You're not ready.. it's ok" He said as he sat down and helped me up.

"I'm.. I'm.. I'm just.." I tried to say something, to say I'm sorry, but I couldn't.

"No its fine.. just breathe.." He ordered as he rubbed my back.

"I.." I started.

"I'm going to take a quick shower.." He said as he got up.

I searched for my phone, and called my best friend. I think I might need some advice after all.

"A7isa mit'6ayig" I told her miserably.

"Do you love him?" She asked after I told her what happened.

"Why are you asking me this question.. shfeekum 3ala hal as2ila il sa5eefa ilyoom!!" I screamed.

"Just answer me.." She replied calmly.

"Madry.. maybe.. it's too soon to tell.." I replied nervously.

"Are you happy with him?" She asked.

"Yes.." I said, smiling.

"Do you miss him when he's not around?" She asked this time.

"Well, we have been together for almost two months and there hasn't been a day where I didn't see him, so I didn't have the chance to experience that.." I answered.

"So, you want to have a day where there is no him?" She continued.

"No.. why would I want that!" I said.

"Do you enjoy talking to him?" She asked.

"I do.. he's understanding most of the time.. when he's not being silly at least" I answered, laughing.

"When you think about your future, is he a part of it?" She continued her interrogation.

"Well, of course ya3ny.. he's my husband!" I exclaimed.

"Are you two smiling, in your imagination, is it a happy future?" She asked.

"Yes, it is.. why wouldn't it be?" I said.

"What do you feel when you look into his eyes?" She ignored my question.

"Unbelievable.. its magic.. something else.." I tried to explain, but failed.

I only succeeded in getting the butterflies in my stomach in havoc, just by recalling his eyes.

"Go on.." She urged.

"Madry walla.. it's just that his eyes are beautiful.. I've never seen eyes so deep before.." I continued.

"Oh sure.. it has nothing to do with the fact that you are in fact falling for him!" She insisted.

"I am not!" I told her.

"Ok then.. why did you not answer his question.. why didn't you tell him: no, I hate you M7ammad" She asked.

"I do not hate him!!!!" I said.

"Then what's the feeling called.. when you don't hate someone?" She pushed.

"It's called being neutral.. just liking them.." I told her.

"Ok.. then you wouldn't mind if he looked around for someone that loves him, would you?" She said.

"WHAT! Of course I do, he's my husband!!" I screamed.

"So you're claiming him yours, but in the same time you don't want to admit that you have feelings for him?" She asked.

"He is mine.. he's my husband whether he likes it or not!" I stated.

"Do you like it?" She asked.

"I do.." I said, after a while.

"You love him.." She declared.

"I do not.." I said, not so sure myself.

"Then describe your feelings towards him.." She insisted.

"Madreeeeeee.. walla madry!!" I said.

"That's just denial.. because you are falling for him.. slowly.. just admit it, you're falling for him.." She screamed, happily.

"Ok.. fine.. I think I am falling for him.. slowly" I replied.

"Wonderful.. my work here is done .. go tell him.." She said.

"Ok.. thank you.. I love you!" I told her.

"You love him.." She stated once more.

"Bye.." I said, laughing.

I think the whole conversation took about an hour. But M7ammad still didn't come out. I went inside, looking for him, and there he was sitting on one of the couches, watching TV.



----- M7ammad


"Hey.." She smiled, as she sat beside me.

"Hey yourself.." I smiled back as I wrapped my arms around her.

"Kil hatha shower?" She asked, laughing.

" I went outside to check on you and you were talking on the phone, so I came here because I didn't want to bother you.." I told her.

"Yeah.. I was talking to my best friend.." She said, smiling.

"Some serious business you two were talking about.. you were so engrossed, you didn't even notice me coming" I joked.

"Yeah.. just catching up.." She said as she laughed.

"Soo.. shlonich ba3ad?" I asked, playing with her hair.

"You know.. I .. I think I might me falling for you.. maybe.. bas I don't really know if it's love yet.. I mean it's too soon right? Madree.. Bas I do have feelings for you I think.. Madree.." She said, nervously, as she kept her eyes on the TV.

"I am not asking for anything more.." I said as I kissed her forehead.

I let my lips linger for a while, before looking at her. She was smiling, satisfied, happy.


_____________________________________

Hope you enjoyed ;)

Meant to Be (Part 34)

Long one!! ;D
Enjoy..

This one is dedicated to Abrar..
check out her blog...
http://the-optimum-of-beauty.blogspot.com/

and I am sooooooooo sorry for not replying to your comments..
I promise I will this post inshallah..
Thank you for all your comments..

____________________________________






----- M7ammad


"Shai5aaaaaa" I called as I looked around for her.

I didn't find her, so I called her.

"Wainich?" I asked when she picked up.

"Kany.." She replied.

"Ee wain?" I asked again.

"Ma ra7 agoolik.. 3ashan you pull my hair like you did awal!" She said.

"Come on.. where are you seriously" I laughed.

"Ma ra7 agoolik.. you have to figure it out for yourself!!" She replied, laughing.

"Ok.. bas a5er marra agoolich.. it's just sincere advice for you, you know, tell me
where you are now.. because if I find, you are my hostage, and I can do whatever I want with you" I warned jokingly.

"As if I'm not your hostage now.." She mumbled.

"You're not, yet.. but you will be" I continued, looking around.

"Ok, but you have 5 minutes only, and if you don't find me, then you are my hostage" she replied laughing.

"15 minutes.." I said.

"5 minutes.." I replied.

"No, 15" I stated again.

"Fine, 10" she said.

"Done.. bye" I replied, as I thought of places she can be hiding in.

"Bye.." She said laughing.

I looked around, and tried to think of the places where she would hide in.

I looked under the table, behind the couches, in the chicken coop, behind the trees, I didn't find her.

7 minutes have passed and I still didn't find her.

I called her again.

"Where are you!!" I exclaimed.

"You are supposed to find out for yourself.. and you have what, 3 minutes left?" She said

"Ok.. give me a hint.." I told her.

"No.. no hints.." She replied.

"If I find you, it's not going to be good!!" I warned one last time.

"Bring it on.." she said, laughing.

"You asked for it!!" I replied as I closed the phone.

I looked around for 3 more minutes, then she called me.

"Your time is up!!!" She exclaimed.

"So where are you?!" I asked.

"I'm waiting for you outside.." She said.

I went outside, and saw her sitting on a bench, with a wide grin across her face.

"My hostage.. there you are!!" She said with a chuckle.

I ignored her and just stared.



----- Shai5a


"So, hostage.. give me 50 push-ups" I said as I laughed.

He raised an eyebrow, and dropped, skillfully doing 10 push-ups, like it was nothing.

Bad idea, I thought to myself, because he looked unreasonably hot while exercising.

He stopped after 25 push-ups.

"Hey, hey, hey.. you can't stop until you finish all 50!!" I said.

"I just want to take off my shirt.. do you mind?" He asked as he threw it on the
bench. "Tabeeny a3eed mn awal 7abeebty wala la2?" He asked challengingly.

"La2.. you can stop if you want to" I said, as I looked away.

"Noo.. 6alabatich awamer.. I can finish 25 more push-ups" He said with a wink, and he continued his push-ups.

I thought about taking a look, just one look at his toned back. That's it, just one look, I thought to myself. But I found myself staring at his perfectly sculpted back until he finished and looked at me with a smirk.

Of course, when he turned around my sanity was not getting any better. I blushed as I looked at his six-pack, more defined than I have ever seen in my life.

"Why are you staring?" He asked as he stretched.

"I'm not staring.." I said as I looked at my feet and decided to stare at them instead.

"Whatever you say.. so we're even now?" He asked.

"Yes we are.." I replied, not wanting to think of anything that might turn out against me after all.

"Good.." He said, as he went to the kitchen, brought a bottle of water. "What's next princess?" He asked.

"Shdarany?" I replied as I sat down.

"Table tennis?" He asked.

"Sure.. except you have to teach me.." I told him.

"Fine.. yalla ta3alay.." He replied as he led the way.

"Your shirt.." I said as I pointed to the shirt thrown in the bench.

"Why, don't you think my abs are hot?" He joked.

I rolled my eyes, and walked after him. I don't think I'm going to concentrate after all.

He took me to a room, in the back. I have never been there, but I heard that the guys brought all the equipment and put together a mini gym. I must admit I was kind of impressed. The place looked amazing.

The only things I can attempt to use though, are the treadmill, bicycle, and the table tennis equipment if M7ammad taught me how to play. The rest was all weight-lifting and scary looking machines that I would never go near.



----- M7ammad


"God.. I miss this place!!" I said as I took a look around, just checking on the machines.

"You did a good job putting this together!!" She told me with a smile.

"I love it in here" I replied, returning her smile.

"Yalla.. tennis?" She said, enthusiastically.

"Ok.." I replied as I looked for the rackets (or whatever they are called).

"Can I help?!" She asked coming after me.

"No.. not really.." I told her, as I looked on the shelves.

"Kaifik.." She said as she sat on one of the bouncing balls.

"I don't think we can play tennis .. I can't find the balls or the rackets.." I said. "Wait, let me call Fahad" I continued as I called him.

I talked to him, yelled at him, and closed the phone.

"We don't have to play tennis!" She said wide-eyed.

"You think I was yelling because I want to play tennis?" I asked disbelievingly.

"No.. madry.." She replied, baffled.

"I was yelling because half of the equipment that I bought is missing because they did not lock the room, and the kids were playing around with the machines and stuff! They have no idea how long it took me to put this place together.." I sighed.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sure you can find replacement easily.. we can go buy some now if you want to.." She said in a comforting way.

"No, it's fine.. I'll look for some later.." I said, as I looked around, checking on my machines.

"I can come with you if you want.." She offered.

"Ma7alat shabab.. intay shako tyeen?" I snapped at her.

She kept quiet, and just followed me around.

I stopped next to my favorite machine, I carried her and put her on the seat.

"Sorry.." I said as I kissed her forehead.

She smiled, and looked at me caringly.

"Are you ok now?" She asked.

"Yes" I assured her.

"Good.." She said with a breathtaking smile.

"You want to try this beauty?" I asked as I pointed to the machine.

"This is your definition of beauty?" She asked incredulously.

"Ee.. 3ayal shno bas intay il 7ilwa ya3ny?" I joked.

"La2.. bas ya3ny.. la2 maby " She replied laughing.

"Try it.. shno tabeen I start with one kg for you?" I asked mockingly.

"How about you do it first 3ashan ashoof ba3dain ana?" She said as she jumped off the seat quickly.

"Fine with me.." I said as I got on there. It wasn't really painful exercise, but it was effective, this machine especially. "Look, you just hug this piece and push it down.. this targets your lower abdominal area" I continued.



----- Shai5a

I stared at his back once more.

This is heaven, I thought to myself.

"Are you paying attention at all?" He asked.

"yeah, yeah.." I replied staring at his arms now.

Not a smart decision, I thought to myself.

Basically everything about this guy screamed macho.

"Your turn.." He said as he got up.



----- M7ammad


She sat on there and looked at me like she was lost.

"Come on.." I encouraged her.

"There is nothing wrong with my lower abdominal area, you know.." she replied as she pouted.

"There is nothing wrong with mine either.." I said as I winked.

"Fine.. I don't feel like it.." She told me.

"Try it.. 3ashany.. and I'll set it on one kg.. wait.." I said. "Ok.. you're good to go now.." I said as I fixed it.

"M7ammad.." She started.

"Hug it.. and push" I said.

She hugged it, and tried to push. I rolled my eyes because it wasn't moving at all.
Discretely, I pushed it down, helping her.

"Oh, this is kind of easy!" She said with a smile, and she tried again.

"Yeah.. shiftay.. it's simple.." I told her.. as I pushed it for her a second time.

"This is kind of cool" She replied, doing it again.

I pushed it for her one last time.

"Yalla 5ala9 goomay.. I don't want you all muscley for me now.." I said as I carried her off the seat.

"We should come here tomorrow too" She said with a wide grin.

"We will inshallah.." I replied as I closed the lights before locking the door.


____________________________________


Hope you enjoyed..
:)

meant to be (Part 33-B)

Hiii ;p
short one again..
bas I promise there is going to be a long one soooooon..
ya3ny monday/tuesday..

and sorry I haven't replied to your comments on the last post..
but thank you all for commenting..
w sorry la2ana they're short...

But, believe it or not.. I am busy ;P

This is dedicated to the lovely person who does not understand arabic..
I think this one has no arabic at all (I think again ;p)

________________________________





----- Shai5a


We got there, and I wasn't really that nervous. I expected myself to be a wreck, but I guess I got used to him.

We cooked breakfast together, omelets that turned out to be more on the inedible side since he was so goofy. He would carry me around, try to flip the omelet and it would end up on the floor, drop random things in the pan, and just drive me crazy until I gave up on them. So we ended up just eating '5ubz w jibin'.

"So what do you feel like doing now?" He asked me.

"Hmm.. I don't really mind doing anything.." I replied with a smile.

"anything as in ANYTHING?" He asked with a smirk.

"No.. not really Anything.." I laughed.

"I thought so too.." He replied, laughing along.

We sat in outside on one of the benches, silently.

"How about we play a game.. and the winner has to decide the activities for the rest
of the day.." He said after a while.

"What game?" I asked.

"Rock-paper-scissors?" He suggested.

"No, I hate that game; it's so unfair!!!" I said immediately, and I started rambling
on and on about the incidents when people would cheat and I would always end up losing the game.

We talked some more about our childhood.

"I don't really remember you a lot.." I said as I tried to recall anything that reminds me of him.

"I only remember crashing your dress-up parties with mariam.. that was a loooot of fun!!" He said as he laughed.

"Hey!!! That was you.. you're soooo mean!!" I said as I pouted.

"Yeah.. me and fahad and your brothers.. those were our golden days!!" He said as he roared again.

"I am never ever talking to you again.." I said as I got up.

Of course I was just joking, but that was really mean. I remember crying for hours after they destroyed our palace made from scarves and pillows. They pulled our hair, and ruined everything there is to be ruined. I went inside, just to see what he would do.

It was kind of exhilarating, just anticipating what he was going to do and how he would react. M7ammad is so unpredictable, and I love it, sometimes.


__________________________________________

Hope u enjoyed ;p