Meant to Be (Finale)

Again, I'm sorry if the ending will dissapoint some of you.

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Their night out did not end as anyone would have expected.



M7ammad was looking at shai5a who was too busy blushing at something he just said to her, as he was driving.



They had an accident.



Shaikha was in a coma for 6 months.



M7ammad wasn't in a coma, nor was he dead.



M7ammad woke up the day after the accident.



But, M7ammad lost his memory.



He lost 10 years of his life.



When M7ammad woke up, all he could think was "Manal"



No amount of talking or begging or official papers would convince him that he had a wife other than his Manal.



Manal wasn't hard to track down, and things weren't too complicated on her side because she was recently divorced.



Everyone tried to interfere.



Everyone cried for "M7ammad and Shaikha," for their love story.



But M7ammad wouldn't budge.



And after a while, they lost hope that Shaikha would wake up.



So M7ammad and Manal got married and started reliving their story.



Every now and then M7ammad would get flashbacks, glimpes of Shaikha, her eyes, her smile, he'd feel like something was missing from him. But he didnt know what that thing was, or that his life would never be complete without Shaikha. He didn't know the whole picture because he never regained his full memory back.



Shaikha..



She was the same girl from the outside, minus the glowing eyes and beautiful smile.



From the inside, she didn't even recognize her own self.



She felt dead.



She asked for only one thing from M7ammad, to keep her as his wife on papers.



Why?



No one knew the reason. She didn't even know it.



Whether they will ever get back their story.. is up to fate.



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Sometimes things don't turn out as we expected.

It is nice to have faith, to have hope.

But sometimes, these are exactly the things that kill us.




The old post from the future might have been a dream, or it might be a few chapters ahead in their story.    

I'm not sure if im going to post another story about their future or not..    

Until their fate is decided.. each one of you can create the ending she dreamed of.    



Meant to be (part 47)

Hello everyone..
Sorry adry wayed 6awalt as usual..
This is going to be the post gabel the last one..
I'm sorry if the ending is going to dissapoint some of you..
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 ----- Shai5a

 I opened my eyes slowly, hoping that my throbbing headache won't be exacerbated by the light.

I realized then that it wasn't just my head that was hurting, my whole body felt like it was on fire.

I stared at the ceiling trying to figure out where I was.

I heard a voice calling but I was too dizzy to understand what was going on around me.

"Shai5a" the voice was a bit more clear now.

"Mama.." I recognized her voice, my voice barely audible.

"7abeebti.." She said and I could hear it in her voice that she was crying.

I felt a sharp pain in my chest and forced myself to sit up shwaya so that I could see my surroundings.

I was in a hospital.

"Mama shilsalfa?" I asked dazed.

The doctor came in and started examining me; I couldn't really hear what he was saying to me.

 He gave up on trying to ask me and mumbled a few words to my dad who came in after him before he left the room.

"m7ammad.. waina?" I asked after a while, my voice croaky.

My mom and dad looked at each other, both of their eyes full of tears.

That sharp pain in my chest came back again.

"m7ammad waina?" I repeated.

 "M7ammad safar 3inda sh'3l.." My dad said in an unconvincing manner.

"laish ma galy? mita safar? w ana laish hny?" I asked

 My mom cried as she held my hand tightly.

I pulled my hand away, as all sorts of possibilities came through my mind.


















I'm staring at the ceiling as I remember that day.

My tears, which got used to their free reign by now, are flowing.

I ask myself over and over again..

Why?

Why does it hurt so much?

I open my laptop to go through our pictures as I do every night, but my flash disk doesn't work.

I feel too weak to panic.

I feel like someone took the last unshattered piece of my heart.

I feel helpless.

I try over and over again.

I try until there are no more tears.

That flash disk was the only thing I had left of him.

I feel numb.

I stare at the ceiling again.

I stare until I fall asleep for the first time in 6 months without going through every picture of us together.

Is it a sign? I ask myself

A sign to move on?

Is there such a thing as moving on?



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What do you think happened?

Meant to Be (part 46)

I know I have no excuse to keep you waiting hal kither bas I needed the break Im not sure when I'll post next.. second year medicine is not exactly a piece of cake.. im sorry again.. ________________________________

----- Shai5a One thing I hate about myself is that I am completely clueless when it comes to the streets of Kuwait. “Where are we going?” I complained as I tried to figure out where we were exactly. “I didn’t even blindfold you baby and you can’t figure it out” He laughed as a furrowed my eyebrows trying to focus. “stop calling me baby” I replied. “But you are my baby” he said innocently. “But I’m not a baby.. so you can choose another word to express your love” I insisted. “I’ll think about it baby” he smiled at me. I rolled my eyes, smiling in spite of myself. “Just tell me where we are now and I’ll figure out where we are going” I said. “not a chance..” He winked. And the rest of the car ride consisted of the same thing of the same scenario being played over and over again. I realized that he took us to their mazra3a when he parked there, because I am in fact that clueless. “you could’ve just told me you know..” I said as he got out of the car. “But then I’d miss out on the pleasure of annoying you..” He chuckled as he opened my door. “whatever..” I couldn’t help but smile as I tried to get out of the car but he pushed me back in. “I have things planned in a certain way..” He said mischievously. “Shno ya3ny?” I pretended to be annoyed. “Ya3ny.. awal shay you have to wear this..” he said as he gave me a scarf. “You’re so weird” I rolled my eyes as I wrapped the scarf around my neck. “That’s not really what I had in mind..” he replied as he pulled the scarf gently bringing me closer to him. After a quick peck on the lips, he blindfolded me with the scarf. “M7ammad maby” I tried to get it off but he already had my hands secured with one of his as he carried me and kicked the car’s door closed. “This is so not fair” I pouted. “You pouting isn’t fair... because I’ll have to postpone everything I had in mind and kiss you right now.. and it won’t be a quick one this time..” He said and he let his lips linger on mine a little longer than last time until I was smiling instead of pouting. “Aren’t you going to tell me what you’re going to do?” I complained again. He ignored me and continued walking until he dropped me on what I assumed what bed. I took the opportunity to remove the blindfold and look around. I was in his sister’s room, and nothing looked abnormal. He left the room and locked the door behind him before I had the chance to say anything else. Giving up, I lay down on the bed waiting for him to come back. After almost 10 minutes he came back smiling. ----- M7ammad “ha jahza?” I said beaming at her. “not until you tell me what you have in mind” she replied. “that’s my cue then..” I said as I picked her up and made my way outside. “this is so not fair” she struggled to get out of my grip. “I’ll let you carry me next time if it makes you feel better baby” I laughed at her. She glared at me but kept quiet. I hugged her tightly.. making sure her face was buried in my chest 3ashan ma tshoof anything yet. Once we got to the table, I let her go and placed her on the chair as I kissed her forehead. I looked at her as she took in the scene. Her eyes widened and she gaped. “M7ammad..” She said softly, not looking at me. “3yoon m7ammad..” I replied as I sat down next to her. “I love you..” She said, tears beginning to rim her beautiful eyelashes. Her eyes sparkling, her nose getting red, still gaping at the scene. I think I’ve seen my fair share of beautiful women around the world, but in this moment, I knew that she was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, and I had a feeling that I will be thinking that for a very long time. __________________________ I hope you enjoyed..

Meant to Be (part 45)

Hellooo :)

Sorry 6awalt bas uni is taking up all my time!

Inshallah I will try to finish the story in this break!

Enjoy:D


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----- Shai5a


University was extremely stressful, the pre-med competition, the crazy schedule, the rude girls everywhere. My life was a mess outside the house basically, and sometimes, I don't even have time to talk to M7ammad.

He's always understanding, but I know he didn't particularly like it. I didn't like it myself.

My chemistry midterm was today, and honestly I was just dying from the amount of stress and the fear of flunking my first uni test.

My exam was at 11, but I woke up at 6 when M7ammad did to go to work.

I quickly grabbed the first thing I got from the closet and ironed it as I waited for M7ammad to leave the bathroom.

"Oh sorry ga3adtich 7abeebti?" he asked as he got out of the bathroom.

"La its fine, I want to review anyways" I told him.

"3ayal good morning" He hugged me tightly.

"Stressful morning you mean" I replied grumpily.

"La la moo stressful, you studied well, and you answered all the questions I asked you yesterday correctly" He said.

"M7ammad, remind me, shno your questions? You basically asked me to complete the titles of the lectures before you fell asleep" I laughed.

"Bas I woke up again for you, and I asked you about the subtitles too!" He chuckled.

"Yeah yeah, inzain yalla badel 3ashan ma tit2a5ar" I told him as I went to the bathroom.

M7ammad was waiting for me when I got out, and after I finished dressing we both headed downstairs.

"I'll drop you off today a7san" he said as we sat for breakfast.

"No I'm fine, I can drive" I replied.

"I'm not really asking you, I'm just telling you" He smirked as he filled my plate with cheese and cucumbers.

"M7ammad 7aram, I don't even want breakfast la t7e6 wayed" I complained, ignoring his previous comment.

"La you're eating all of this 3ashan you have energy for the exam. Moo min ams myaninatny 3indy exam w 3indy exam, yalla it's my turn now to annoy you about your exam" He said as he placed the plate in front of me.

"Sometimes you are just annoying" I told him.

"Tara your exam is not a big deal, ya3ny it is only 30% of your grade. If you ditch it and go out with me for example, you can still pass if you did well in your final" He joked.

"Whatever M7ammad" I said, trying to hide my smile.

"tara ilyoom intay wayed ma36eetny 6af, awal shay no good morning kiss, wala I love you, w il7een moo 3ajbich kalamy ba3ad.." He complained pouting.

"I'll make it up to you when I finish my exam inshallah" I said.

"Nshoof" He replied smiling. "Bas I can't go through the day without my good-moring kiss, so you'll have to give it to me soon or I'll die.." He pretended to be serious.

"That's not funny at all" I stared at him.

"Me dead is not funny?" He joked.

I stopped eating and I looked at him, annoyed.

"I'm sorry 5ala9" He laughed as he continued eating his breakfast.

He ended up dropping me off. I have no idea why he likes to do it, bas he does.

And he did get his good-morning kiss somewhere along the way.




----- M7ammad


I was just as stressed about Shai5a's exams as she was, because I didn't want her to be upset about anything, even if it was a trivial as a midterm grade. I knew she was smart, and I knew she could do it. However, I also knew that sometimes no matter how much you study, you simple cannot get grades in medical school.

Her exams went by pretty quickly, and today her results will be out so I'm planning on surprising her.



----- Shai5a


Il7imillah I did well in my midterms even though I did not expect that at all. M7ammad is taking me out today bas apparently I can't know where.

"Inzain shda3wa just tell me wain.." I complained.

"La2 it's a surprise love" He replied.

"Please.." I continued.

"No.." He smiled, pinching my cheeks.

"Inzain shlon adry shno albes?" I asked.

"Ily yray7ech.." He said.

"I'm going to dress up la2ana I feel like it.. so please don't take me somewhere with mud.." I told him as I picked my outfit.

"You'll never know until we're there.." He winked.

"Inzain should I wear heels? Please bas answer this question.." I said.

"It's up to you.. and don't worry I'll carry you if you can't walk.." he told me.

"Yeah as if I'll let you do that.." I laughed.

"kaifich 3ayal.. walk barefoot jidam ilnas.." He replied.

"I'm not wearing heels 5ala9.." I grumbled as I got ready.



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Hope you enjoyed!

Meant to Be (part 44)

Hey ;D

Adry, adry :p

I'm sorry bas I needed the break is all I can say..

Thank you killikum, your comments and emails mean A LOT!

Please aby a3arf if you want me to continue the story till like part 50 ..

Or taboony a5ale9ha bser3a in like 2 parts?

short post bas I will write again as soon as i can!


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---- M7ammad


I woke up the next morning, and felt the bed for Shaikha because she wasn't in my arms as usual.

I heard the water run in the bathroom, and went there quickly, hoping that she forgot to lock the door, but was disappointed when I got there.

"Shaikhaaaaaaa" I called, crankily.

I'm guessing she didn't hear me because there was no reply.

"Shayooooooo5" I screamed.

I heard something fall.

"Ouuuch.. Na3am, shno, shfeek?" She replied startled as she stopped the water.

"Intay ily shfeech" I laughed.

"6a7 il shampoo 3ala reely.. w mako shay y'6a7ek" She said, not able to stop herself from laughing.

"Inzain open the door" I told her.

"I'm taking a shower" She said slowly, as if she was trying to show me how stupid I was to ask her that.

"Adry, and I also know that I've seen it all.. so open the door" I said mischievously.

"M7ammad.. bas 3ad maly 5lg" she replied.

"Intay killa malich 5lg mako shay yideed.. open the f***** door" I told her, smiling, knowing that this is going to piss her off.

"cham marra gaylatlik la tseb M7ammad?" She said, annoyed.

" f*** " I repeated.

"M7ammaaaad!!" She exclaimed.

" f*** and ***** ok?" I laughed.

"That is it!" She almost screamed, and opened the door with her towel tightly wrapped around her slender figure. " w ba3dain ma3ak ya3ny?" She said as she stared at me angrily.

"9aba7 il 5air 7abeebti" I replied innocently. "are you done taking a shower?" I asked as I went inside the bathroom.

"M7ammaaad la tista3be6!!!" She tried to drag me out.

"Look honey, I'm going to take a shower, so if you want to join me 7ayach, and if you don't please close the door, bas I don't mind you peeking tara" I smiled evilly.

"I can't believe you!" She complained, but quickly closed the door when she realized that I was really serious about taking a shower, whether or not she was watching.

"Oh and I forgot to tell you how hot you look in that towel!" I screamed after her.



----- Shai5a


I went to the other bathroom and took a really quick shower after the stunt that M7ammad decided to pull.

I dressed in the other room too, knowing that M7ammad would not let me dress in peace in out room.

"Shai5aaa.." I heard him call.

"m7amaaad" I called back.

"Are you done?" He asked.

"Yeah kind of!" I replied.

He came into the room wearing his navy scrubs, with his hair still wet.

"Mumkin afham laish il 7araka il bay5a ily saweetha this morning?" I asked him, trying my best not to smile.

"3ashan marra thanya lama agoolich tifti7een il bab, tifti7eena 3ala 6ool.." He said with his eyebrow raised. "Ok?"

I stared at him, but knowing M7ammad, I would not win this argument any time soon, so I let it go 3ashan la at2a5ar 3al jam3a.

"I think you forgot something.." He said as I took my books and headed to the door.

"Shno?" I asked worried.

"My good morning kiss" He smiled innocently.

"You're not getting one honey.." I said as I hurried towards the door, but sadly he was much faster than me especially that I was carrying a couple of books.

"Awal shay, shaklich chinich yadity w intay shayla hathool, so give me the books.." He said as he blocked the door. " w thany shay, you know perfectly well that you are going nowhere without giving me my kiss.. so do it" He laughed.

I kissed him on the cheek quickly, and motioned for him to move so I can open the door.

He rolled his eyes, and pulled me for a kiss of his own, as he opened the door.

"M7ammad tara mit2a5ra so bser3a nazely the books please!" I said.

"Ok 3ayal ana awa9lich 3ashan ma tisre3een bl sayara.." He replied.

"La ana broo7y baroo7!" I told him.

"Intay ma t3arfeen tsoogeen, ana awa9lich!" He said.

"M7amad.. you better put the books in my car and leave bser3a.." I said annoyed that he was making fun of my driving skills.

"Inzain, don't forget to call me when you get there, w la tasre3een" He ordered me seriously.

"Inshallah" I replied and drove off with a smile refusing to leave my face.



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Hope you enjoyed ;D

Meant to Be (Part 43)

Hello..

I posted finally.. :D

It's kinda short though, and there are some not so innocent moments in there ;p
sorry ;p

please id3ooly with my exams..

and good luck everyone with whatever you are doing..


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----- M7ammad


The days have passed and I can only say that I grew more and more attached to Shaikha.

Well, I can't say that we are acting like husband and wife fully, as much as I want to do just that, but that is mainly because she is a very shy person.

"M7ammad.." She called, interrupting the part where I undress her with my eyes, shamelessly.

"Hmm.." I replied, still distracted.

"Stop staring!" She ordered.

"Only if you stop resisting.." I mocked her.

"You are unbelievable.." She stated.

"But you love me.." I softly kissed her neck.

"M7ammad.." She replied breathlessly.

"I want you now.." I said, for the millionth time since we got married.

"But.." She said, running out of excuses as her cheeks flushed.

"I'm listening.." I replied,

"It's 10 in the morning.." She stated.

"So? " I asked.

"So.. you can't do this in the morning.." She said.

"Why not.." I chuckled.

"Because.. because.. you just can't.." She replied, flustered.

"Then watch me.." I said, pecking her lips.

"M7ammaaad.." She pleaded with her eyes closed.

"ya3nee lee mita?" I sighed.

"Tonight.. bas not now.." She said hopefully.

"You think I'm going to fall for that again?" I asked chuckling.

"La2 hal marra 9ij.." She stated.

"Yeah right, and then you'll go and sleep in my mom's room just like last time you said tonight.. or is it going to be like the time you stayed in the bathroom for three hours showering and then pretended you were asleep as soon as your head was on the pillow?" I teased her.

She sighed.

"Give me some credit.. it's not going to be bad.." I promised confidently.

She stayed quiet as I trailed kissed from her neck to her defined collarbone.

"If you really don't want to, I suppose I can wait another day or two.." I said with my eyes closed, the idea of waiting paining me.

"I just want to do one thing first.." She said quietly.

"Ok.." I said hesitantly, as she jumped out of bed.

She locked the door, closed the lights and the curtains, and made her way back to me slowly.

"Alright.." She said, unsure.

"A7ibich tadreen.." I said as I held her closer to me, feeling her body melt to my touch immediately.

And I can only say, it was definitely worth the wait.




----- Shaikha


I blushed furiously as I remembered the details of the past few days, since he had everything his way after that night, or morning to be more accurate.

His birthday was coming up soon, and I had one thing planned for sure, I was going to tell him that I love him.

I blushed again at the thought of saying these words out loud, and I tried whispering them, but failed again.

M7ammad barged into the room and walked to the bed, plopping himself next to me, as he hugged my side.

"7abeebty.." He said, exhausted.

"Shlonik?! Had a rough day?" I asked him, putting my hands on his cheeks and tracing his perfect gufel.

"Kind of.." he replied with his eyes closed.

"Allah ya36eek il 3afya.." I said caringly.

"Allah y3afeech.. did you miss me?!" He asked.

"Of course.." I replied smiling.

"Then say it.." He said with a smile of his own.

" No.." I teased him.

"Laish?" He pouted, and I felt like kissing him but I didn't want to go that way, knowing how it will end.

"Simply because I miss you too much that words can't really express.." I said, as I let him hug me properly, enjoying the warmth radiating from his body.

"7abeebty intay walla.. I missed you too.." He kissed my forehead, and from my experience with him, I knew that he will not stop the conversation. Just like he read my mind, he continued: " Inzain, do you love me?" He asked opening his eyes now and looking at me hopefully.

I felt my cheeks burning as soon as I heard the L-word and my ears were not in a better shape either.

"Ya3ny laish ma tgooleenha.. kil hatha w ma t7ibeeny?" He asked, sounding like a little boy.

I was tongue-tied, as usual, because as soon as he says anything related to love, I'm just forced to remain quiet by an overwhelming force that I cannot overcome.

"I will make you scream that you love me tonight.." He smirked.

"Ya 8aleel il adab.." I muttered feeling my face turn to a very unattractive shade of rouge.

"Say that one more time and I will show you mno 8aleel il adab.." He said, and although he had a goofy expression on his face, his tone sounded serious.

I gulped involuntarily, and he chuckled as he hugged me closer, finally surrendering to sleep.



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Hope you enjoyed..

See you all in a while if I do survive my exams!!

Reconciling Hearts..

Hellooo ;DD

I miss my blog soooo much and i miss all of you guys!!

Thank you those who have been in touch,
and I promise that I will post one part of the story this month,
even if it meant failing an exam or two ;p

This is dedicated to all my readers and followers :)

Random post btw..

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She took a deep breath, trying to control the ragged movements that her chest was making as a failing attempt to breathe when he entered the elevator quickly.

The elevator's doors closed just before she was about to rush outside.

He looked at her, and even though he didn't recognize her at first, the emotions displayed in her eyes as she looked his way in a frantic manner gave her away.
Only one girl would mirror all these feelings, her.

A slight smile formed on his beautiful face as he realized that fate has finally brought her his way again.

She, however, did not find that coincidence a pleasant one, all the memories came pouring down, flashing sporadically, making her shiver at their intensity.

The elevator's doors opened one more time, it was his stop but not hers.

She thanked god silently because she was going to collapse very soon and she didn't want that to happen in front of him.

He took one more look at her, and grabbed her arm unexpectedly, making her heart stop.

Was it his touch, the one that she yearned for, that made everything freeze?

Or was it the look in his eyes? Everything seemed chaotic there, and she couldn't put a finger on what she saw in his deep chocolate-brown eyes. But she saw beautiful hues of passion there somewhere.

She felt her body rigged with fear of what he was about to do with her, but most importantly she feared that she would not be able to tame her emotions anymore.

Thankfully, his room was only two steps away from the hallway where the elevators were, so no one noticed him half-pulling and half-carrying her to his room.

As soon as he released her hands, she turned away from him, not allowing him to see her face.

He locked the door twice, and the sound of the lock made her gulp.

She looked at him fearfully, as he smiled, taking in her features and tracing them with his eyes.

"Mno?" She said, realizing how stupid she sounded even to herself, because everyone knew that she cannot forget him.

"Mno?" He asked mockingly as he took a step towards her.

"La2?" She replied quickly, although it sounded more like a question.

"3ayal?" He asked.

"Shno?" She looked at him, her beautiful eyes wide with shock as he closed the gap between them in one big step.

She tried to take a step back, but soon she was pinned to the wall. Their bodies weren't really touching because he had his hands on both of her sides, preventing her from escaping, but in the same time keeping an arm's distance.

"Intay jawbay.. mno ana?" He asked her, wanting to hear her say his name.

"Madry.." She replied looking around the room, trying desperately not to get captured into the brown prisons of his eyes.

He took a tiny step closer to her, and she knew where this was going.

"M7ammad.." She whispered, her voice begging him to leave her alone.

"3yoon M7ammad.." He replied involuntarily, causing her close her eyes momentarily, trying to compose herself.

He cursed himself for being so forward, especially when he hasn't seen her or talked to her for over five years.

He wondered how they came to the conclusion to break up, was it the fact that they were going to different countries to study, was it the fact that he didn't want her to be a doctor because he knew it was tiring and he wanted the best for her, or was it the fact that both of them were really stubborn?

He shook his head, not believing that five years had already passed.

He was a doctor himself, and while he left to specialize abroad, she stayed in Kuwait to study medicine.

She didn't want him to leave Kuwait, and he didn't want her to study medicine, he knew deep down that the miseries of all these people would get to her, and in his eyes she was too fragile to handle that.

Both of them admit that they called each other for months, they even did a couple of weeks ago, he listened to her breathing on the phone, and she silently cried, wishing that one of them would speak up. But the things that had to be said were too abstract for words to illustrate them. But it took one look in the abyss of her honey-colored eyes, and he understood.

They stood silently, both of them hypnotized by the others' eyes. He stepped closer to her as her eyes, beautifully rimmed with long black eyelashes, held a pool of tears. He had the urge to cup her face and kiss her eyes until the tears disappeared. But he held himself back, willing to make everything go right this time because as he got lost into her eyes one more time, he realized how much he is missing.

Her lungs were failing her one more time; from the minute she met his gaze, she felt herself slip slowly.

He looked at her worriedly, realizing that she was probably having an asthma attack.

"Where is your inhaler?" He asked her quickly.

She shook her head, and he cursed under his breath as he went to his drawer and emptied its contents on the desk. He found a puffer and quickly gave it to her. He helped her with it because her hands were shaking, and she leaned on the wall after inhaling twice.

He gently picked her up explaining that he was placing her on the bed before she freaks out.

He went out quickly and got an oxygen mask just to be sure that she was ok.

She pushed it away when he offered it to her.

"Please.." He said breathlessly.

Without opening her eyes, she reluctantly took the mask from him.

After a while, she regained some of her physical composure and got up.

"Wain ray7a?" He asked quickly, not allowing her to get off the bed.

"I'm tired.." She begged him with her eyes to let her leave.

"I know, which is why you should rest a bit.." He said.

"I can't.. please.." Her voice broke as she talked.

"Intay ily please.. let me do this right.. let me fix this.. la2ana both of us know that if you leave this room I might not see you in a very long time la2ana you will be avoiding me.." He begged her.

She sat down again, covering her small face with her hands.

"Shfeech?" He asked concerned, as he felt her breathing get unsteady again.

"I'm really tired M7ammad.." She said as she looked up at him, and he felt his heart shatter.

This time he didn't hesitate as he took her into his arms and hugged her closer to him.

It had been their first time to hug. He felt her body give in to him, as he fought the urge to crush her body against his.

Both of them had a million thoughts going through their minds, but none of them spoke, cherishing the proximity of their bodies.

"Are you feeling better now?" He asked after what seemed like an eternity.

"Yeah.." She replied, a sad smile invaded her face.

"You know I never stopped thinking about you.." He said, while taking her hand into his.

"I never stopped talking to you.." She replied simply.

"Ha?" He replied, confused, although they did call each other, no one uttered a word, except maybe an aloo or two every now and then.

"Well.." She started reluctantly, but then continued. "I wrote to you every day, emails, letters, notes.. but I wouldn't send them.. and I would always talk to you at night, imagining you were hidden behind one of the beautiful, unreachable stars.. and then I would try to guess your reactions which I pretty much knew by heart.." She finished.

He sat her next to him so he can take a good look at her face, she seemed to be in a reverie, and he can almost guarantee that she did not realize that she just spoke aloud because she wasn't usually a person who easily confesses.

He smiled as he watched her expressions, and he cursed himself for being so stupid and thinking he can forget her from the beginning.

"M7ammad?" She said, driving him crazy with the way she said his name.

"7abeebti.." He replied, not being able to control himself.

He saw her cheeks redden and she gave him her back this time.

"M7ammad.. what now?" She said is a sad, distant voice.

" It's simple .. I'm going to make it up for you.." He said confidently. She sighed, and he continued, "Will you give me a second chance?" He asked her, he stood up and knelt in front of her so he can get the answer from her eyes even if she decided to remain quiet. He got his answer immediately, and said "You don't have to tell me now, but you're going to have to tell me soon you know.." His eyes held a mischievous spark in them.

He decided to let the matter go, but then he remembered, "Why isn't your inhaler with you?" He asked, raiisng his eyebrows.

"Why would I need to carry it with me everywhere I go?" She asked, rolling her eyes.

"Well, maybe because you have asthma?" He told her, frowning that she was so careless when it came to her own health yet so careful when it came to others.

"I don't have asthma.. i just have some emotional stress attacks every now and then.." She replied simply.

"And the scientific name for that would be..?" He asked, knowing that he was wining this argument.

"I have to leave.." She said, biting back her smile.

"You know if something happened to you.. I will track you down and you won't like my punishment.. I don't think I can manage to live without you anymore.." He told her, pretending to be angry.

She looked at him for a while before blushing and making her way to the door.

"Not so fast young lady.." He told her as he took hold of both of her hands. "You're under-estimating me you know.. we have a history and I know how stubborn you are.. so I am going to make you promise to take it everyday now or else you are not leaving this room.." He said, chuckling at her reaction.

"I am not young.." She told him sternly.

"I didn't mean it that way.." He told her laughing.

"whatever" She rolled her eyes and tried to free her hands from his.

"I am going to count to three, and then I will kiss you until you give in and promise to take it with you everyday.." He warned her, secretly hoping that she would not say yes before he counts to three.

"one, two.." he said quickly.

"Fine.. I promise!!" She said closing her eyes, fearing that he will actually do it.

"That's my girl.." He said, smiling widely.

"Woman.." She corrected him.

"Are you ever going to get over your age issues?" He laughed at her.

"Never.." She said smiling and left the room quietly, looking back one last time before she took the stairs this time to her floor.









Two weeks have passed and she didn't see him at all since that day. She smiled as she went up to her mother blushing.

"Yes.." She said.










Today, she was his, and he was hers.

"A7ibich.." He whispered after her kissed her forehead on their milcha.




________________________________

Hope you enjoyed..
:)

You, one more time..

helloo..

This is a quick post ...

Exams started this week.. and they end next week..

Wish me luck :)

w I hope everyone does well on their exams..

Dedicated to H..


_______________________________________







I miss you so much, I can truthfully say that I am willing to give up my whole life, my future, my dreams, my everything, to be with you for one day..

to experience the pure bliss accompanied by your smile..

to get those butterflies flying chaotically in my stomach for one more time..

to wash my eyes with happy tears, ones that don't sting..

to breathe in your intoxicating scent..

to listen to your soothing voice..

and this time I'm going to take it all in..

I'm going to saavor every second like it is the last..

I'm going to pay attention..

I'm going to hold on to every word you say, every gesture you make, every smile, every syllable, every blink..

because sometimes, those small details are the only things that manage to make my day..

When I remember the way you used to laugh..

the way you would pronounce certain words..

the way you would gaze into my eyes like I'm the only person around..

the way you would talk to me only..

the times when you would annoy me one purpose just because you want to make it up to me, you want to show me how much you love me you always reasoned..

those times when we shared private jokes..

those times when we used to tell each other everything..

those times when we would make fun of each other..

those times when we were pretending to be mad at each other but our eyes mirrored every emotion, and when we looked down, our voices betrayed us, showing all the love we had for each other..

those times when I missed you.. and you were just a phone-call away..

those times when you comforted me at night..

those times when you were my safe-haven..

those times when I had something to look forward to, talking to you..

Our first touch.. we imagined would be on the beach..

our first hug.. we imagined would be on the beach..

our first kiss.. we imagined would be on the beach..

I go to the beach every day - H - where are you?

You promised you would love me no matter what happened next..

I promise you now that I will be your forever..

No one is going to take your place in my heart..

I love you..



____________________________________________


Take care..

The one and only - H

Hello..

Happy New Year (sorry its late)..

awal shay I'm really sorry for not replying to ur comments or emails..
I am reading them, but I dont have time to reply to all of you..
I will reply to the emails asap inshallah..

As for the story, I will post the next part in February (;S)
Sorryyyyyyyyyyyyy..
Bas I dont want to fail my senior year ..

I will try to finish the story in the winter break inshallah..
we'll see ..

This post is dedicated to H.. on his birthday (as if he reads this ya3ny)..


_____________________________________________







Sometimes we love someone so much that we start to get delusional..

Reality gets mixed up with hopes, dreams, and whims..

Two months ago, it was easy for me to imagine you beside me ..

To imagine our lives together..

To imagine waking up beside you..

To imagine hugging you after a long day..

To imagine your soothing voice..

To imagine your perfect smile..

To imagine you.. but more importantly us..

But with everything going around me right now, it is getting harder and harder..

The possibility of us being together is fading..

And that possibility is the only thing that kept me going for so long..

I'm starting to need you to the point where it is simply painful..

I read about drug addicts and I smile, because being addicted to drugs is much easier than being in love with you..

At least these people can get treated.. whereas no one can find a solution to my problem..

All this is probably meaningless on your birthday..

I should wish you a happy birthday..

I should wish you a happy life..

I should be able to celebrate this day with you..




I love you..

And I hope that one day you will realize how much I do love you..

Happy Birthday..

And may all your wishes come true inshallah..


_________________________________________


Will post next one in a month..

TC!

Imagination Running Wild..

Random post..

Dedicated to H..

_____________________________








"Do you want me?" He asked, smiling knowingly.

She stared at him, hating the fact that she was exposed in every way possible.

"Answer my question.." He imitated the voice she used, every time he chose not to answer her questions.

"Well, your question isn't really clear.. you have to give me a clear definition for the word 'want'" She replied, thinking that she passed the danger zone by making her witty remark.

"Do you want to marry me?" He asked, gazing into her eyes, holding her face, and forcing her to look directly at him.

She closed her eyes, a tear forcefully escaping her secured eyelid.

He traced her tear with his finger, kissing where it stopped, just next to her lips.

He hugged her, feeling every emotion in her tense body melt with his touch.

He felt her love.

He felt her fear.

He felt her attachment.

His heart ached from the depth of the emotions being transferred to him; and he shuddered thinking of what she's going through right now. She was very fragile, and he knew it, but he liked the fact that he was her savior, her protector.

"Intay 7abeebty.." He said, hugging her even closer, trying to assure her that their love is going to last forever.

When in reality, both of them know that they are not meant to be.

She was his, without having to announce it; he had control over every fiber in her body.

They are the perfect match; their souls are made for each other.

But every other thing defies their love.

" I .. " She started, but his lips found hers immediately, savoring their taste, and preserving the sacred silence in which only their hearts were communicating.

She held onto him, only thinking about the moment.

" a7ibich .." He said, moving away before things get too far.

She looked at him, with pain in her eyes. Pain because all the love she has for him was weighing her down. She felt suffocated, she felt weak, she felt tired.

She looked at him, silently asking him to make the pain go away.

He observed her, hating the fact that pain fogged the spark in her eyes.

He scooped her once more in his arms, where they both felt at home.

He tightened his grip on her waist, and almost crushed her against him.

"Do I really have to go down on one knee?" He asked her.

Tears automatically brimmed her eyes again; this time he kissed her eyes tenderly.

"I love you.." She said it aloud for the first time, her voice shaking. She felt her whole body sigh as she verbally confessed for the first time that she loved him.

"Gooleeha ba3ad marra.." He whispered.

"a7ibik.." She replied sincerely, as she bit her trembling lips, "I don't want to lose you" She continued, her voice breaking.

He looked at her, and for the first time he was speechless.

Her words touched him so deeply; he felt his heart break as he watched her trying to compose herself.

He went down on one knee, and without a word he slipped the ring onto her slim finger.

He sat there admiring it, admiring the fact that she is now officially his no matter what anyone else says about it, while she stood still frozen.

She looked up at him, one glance, and she knew what was coming is worth the wait.

She closed her eyes tightly, wanting all the images she was creating to disappear. She was imagining again, this was her thing.

She wiped her eyes as she recalled their beautiful love story, perfect in her imagination. Every time she saw him, she imagined a love-filled conversation, where he would somehow confess all his feelings.

That day never came.

She watched him today, as he held another girl's hands. She watched him kiss her fingers. She watched them silently, wishing that she would die because it would be less painful. She hated herself for being so selfish. Shouldn't she be happy for him?

But how can she happy when all her dreams were shattered in front of her. He was everything she ever wanted, and still is; but life does that sometimes. It deprives you from the only thing you really want, need, and love.


____________________________


Hope you liked it..
And I will try my best to post the story (no promises when)..
TC!

Meant to be (part 42)

3eedkum mbarak mu2a5aran :p

w I hope everyone had a good break :)

Sorry for the extremely late post..

senior year is just hectic + it sucks unfortunately..

This is dedicated to everyone who commented on the last post ;)

Oh and this is a not-so-innocent post ;p (matches my mood for some reason ;P)

__________________________________________







----- M7ammad


When we got home, talked to my mom, and told her that she's going to study medicine. Yabibat and we laughed. She was extremely happy for her, since she knew that it was her dream.

For the first time since we got married, my mom looked at me with respect and pride in her eyes.

She announced that she wants to throw a party for Shai5a, since she didn't get a graduation party and all. A barbeque party she decided, tonight.

"mala da3ee 5alty.." Shai5a replied, smiling.

"La2 5ala9.. ana baroo7 ajahez kl shay.." My mom left us alone.

"Ha ya 7ilwa.. tabeen tit'3adeen il7een?" I asked her.

"Kaifik.. if you're hungry I'll eat with you" She said.

"No I ate in the hospital la2anich ti2a5artay.." I replied.

"And I drank coffee.. so I don't feel like eating.." She smiled.

"Ok then.. let's go.." I said, carrying her up the stairs, and ignoring all her complaints.

I went to the bathroom, and when I got out she was sitting on the bed, flipping through one of her books.

"Isn't that cool??!" She said, her eyes wide with excitement.

"Shno?" I said, as I sat beside her, peaking into the book.

"This is cool.." She said, pointing at the heart diagram, with the vessels looking like the cartoon-heart.

I smiled as I hugged her, and she leaned back on me in response.

"m7ammad.. don't you think I should go help 5alty in the kitchen?" She asked, looking up at me.

"I really don't think so.. I think we should sleep.." I said, tackling her so that she's under me now.

She rolled her eyes, and managed to slip from under me. I watched her get dressed, and head downstairs, laughing at my expression.

A couple of minutes later, she came back, and I laughed at her expression.

"I think I told you not to go.." I chuckled.

"She gave me the death stare and practically kicked me out of the kitchen.." She said, laughing.

"3ashan marra thanya tismi3een il kalam.." I continued laughing.

" Fine whatever.." She said, as she got into her pajamas again, and lied down next to me, and started blabbing about her day.

"Shai5a.." I interrupted after a couple of minutes.

"Shno?" She asked.

"I want to sleep, so I'm going to have to do this so you can shut up for a while.." I said as I pulled her next to me and kissed her lips devouringly.

I hugged her closer, giving her a quick last peck, and went to sleep immediately.




----- Shai5a


I stayed awake, since I was not accustomed to afternoon napping. So I basically watched him sleep for a while. I tried to get up a couple of times, but each time he would tighten his grip and mumble something incomprehensible.

I woke him up after two hours, because we have to get ready and go downstairs.

"M7ammaaaaaaad.. please goom" I whined after tons of nudges and pleas.

"A lady usually wakes her husband with a proper kiss.. until you do that I am not getting up.." He said in a serious tone, but humor was written all over his face.

"M7ammad.." I plead.

But he wouldn't budge.

"Fine.. just loosen your grip a bit so I can kiss you" I said, blushing already.

"Ok.." He said, as he loosened his grip.

I automatically freed myself completely, by ducking my head under his arm, and jumped out of bed.

"Yalla goom.." I laughed.

"You are so going to regret this.." He chuckled as he got out of bed, but I was in the bathroom already with the door safely locked.

"Do want to take a shower too?" I asked.

"Do you want me to join you?" He laughed.

"I'll be done in 30 minutes and then you can have the bathroom.." I said, as I rolled my eyes.

He didn't reply, but I could hear him laughing.



----- M7ammad


She got out of the bathroom after more than an hour, looking fresh and smiley.
I pointed at my watch, indicating the time she took.

"Sorry.. the water was really warm.." She smiled.

"It's alright" I said as I closed the bathroom door after me, "But don't think I forgot about my revenge!!" I shouted from inside.

I took a quick shower, got dressed, and I can see Shai5a still drying her hair, not half way done. She looked like she needed at least 2 more hours before she's ready.

"I am going to head down before you.." I told her as I sprayed perfume all over my dishdasha.

"Ok.. try to help 5alty around.." She replied. "You know I have no idea what to wear, if one of your sisters is downstairs send her up.." She added.

"Inshallah 7abeebty.." I said, as I closed the door.



----- Shai5a


He came up again, after about 5 minutes, he plopped himself on the coach next to me.

"Ana madry intay binthum wala ana waldhum?" He asked.

"Laish?" I asked him laughing.

"Umy 6ardatnee w tgool la tyee ila wiyaha.. Oh and she said I can help you pick an outfit.. but that's not going to happen.." He said.

"That's a wonderful idea!!" I told him.

"No it's not.." He said, bored. "Are you brushing your hair or the air?" He said, as he laughed at his own sentence.

He grabbed the comb from me, and started to brush my hair.

"Ouch!!" I said involuntarily as soon as he touched my hair, expecting him to be very rough.

"Tista3bi6een?" He asked, chuckling.

"Madry.. I thought you were going to pull my hair or something.." I laughed.

"There.. we're all done" He said after a while. He hugged me from the back, kissing the nape of my neck.

I felt like I needed to brush my hair more, just because I was obsessed with having it neat, but I didn't want to show that I'm ungrateful. And the kisses shut me up completely.

"A7ibich.." He whispered, making my insides flip.

"Intay t7ibeeny?" He asked in an even lower voice, and this time I felt my whole body flush. I felt my heart going violent, wanting to scream 'yes.. a7ibik'. But I was tongue-tied.

"Ee wala la2?" He continued asking. I was probably shivering, because he held my hand and I can feel him holding in his laugh.

"You are going to answer me sooner or later you know.." He said as he got up and pulled me with him towards the closet. "Pick something quickly.." He said, as he leaned on the wall.

Absent-mindedly I looked at the clothes, not really taking in what I was looking at.
I looked at him again, and he saw how lost I was.

"It's not a very formal thing.. so just pick any dress or whatever.." He said, trying to be helpful.

I sat down on the floor and stared at the clothes, again not really thinking about what I was going to wear.

"I like this one.." He said as he pulled out a long sky-blue dress, really simple but elegant.

"Ok, I'll wear it" I said as I waited for him to leave the changing room.

I sat on the chair, feeling exhausted for some reason, and got up to wear the dress after a while.

I applied minimal make-up, and we headed down together. The evening went pretty well, and soon it was time to sleep, I didn't say a word, and I guess he was too exhausted too because he was already asleep when I went to bed.



_________________________________________


Hope you liked it :)

You ask me..

I know ina u guys are bored from all the random posts..
but I honestly have no time to write a post 7ag the story..
I slept for one hour bas yesterday..
and this is just part of my venting process..

So.. Im extremely sorry..
and I promise you I will try my best to post this weekend..

________________________________________






You ask me a simple question..

A question, with either a yes or a no, for an answer..

and yet, it's the most difficult question in my life..

How much do you love me?

You ask me, not bothering to ask if I do love you,

Even though I have never said it aloud..

You ask me, even though it's clear..

I love you more than anyone else..

And you know that..

But you still ask..

Even though you can see it in my eyes..

Even though you can sense it..

Even though you can almost touch the love in the air..

The love I carry around for you..

It's becoming a burden, difficult to carry around..

Loving you so much but not being able to actually tell you is torture for me..

I look into your eyes..

wanting you to confess your love..

wanting you to finally make my dreams come true..

But in your eyes..

I see my reflection..

I see my pain..

I see me..

and I see my love for you..

But I can't see you..

Because you refuse to let me in, not matter how hard I tried..


___________________________________


Take care..

My Say on the Shared Story (2)

Dedicated to the brave lady.. and to #1 Anony :)

_____________________________________







First of all, I must say that it is very brave of you to write this. I hope you are feeling a little bit better.

Now, if there is one motto you should follow, it would be around the lines of: tomorrow is a new day, and yesterday is basically over. You should live your life day by day, and stop mourning about the past. Even though it's hard, and you feel like you're losing a part of your identity, but that phase will soon be over. You will be able to look back and be thankful for all the hardships that you went through because they helped shape the way you are now.

I won't focus on the part about your relationship with anyone, I will focus on you. You should try to sit down with yourself and discover who you really are, what you want, and just admit to yourself how you're feeling.

Sometimes people are just in denial, and they refuse to let go. When you say that you feel guilty because you feel like you are cheating on 3aziz, that is you in denial. You might be thinking that he will come back one day, but he isn't because he finally settled in the right place. He might be away from you, but you have to be sure that he happened for a reason, to make you a better person maybe, and he will always be a part of your past.

Your future now, has to involve you moving on. If you really love that guy, go for it, but try not to do it because you want to compensate for your lost love. Really think it through, maybe have a little time to yourself. If he loves you, he will always wait for you no matter what.

Be sure that your soul mate will "happen", whether you are expecting it or not. Try not to think about it and just enjoy yourself, and focus on emotionally recovering first.

I hope this helps .. :)



_______________________

Take care..

Shared Story (2)

This is another story..
she wanted to share..
and I hope you guys offer her some advice..
w I will write my advice in the next post inshallah..

_________________________________________






I was 13 when I first fell inlove. I meet him from flickr and I regret that knw we stayed together for a year he was the perfect guy I lied about something and he found out so he broke up with me.

After a year I logged in my fb and found an inbox from this guy let's call him 3aziz. He was thanking me for accepting his request. We started chatting kna we chat the whole time. Awl mngoom tell we go back to sleep he asked me for my email I don't knw why I gave him I felt like I could trust him. After a week of chatting on msn he told me that he was falling for me and I felt the same way so we became a couple. We talked day and night. Itha knt mt'9ygaa I would go to him he would always be their for me. After 5 months the day before my life becomes black I was chatting with 3aziz.

me*fenyy el 9y7aa
3ziz* laiish 7yatyy shfeech
me* t5ylt my life bdoonk
3ziz* mb a5leech

The next day was his first day for uni w anaa knt fl bait w I woke up at 7 bs 3shaan I be the first to wish him luck on his first day. I talked with him tell he got to uni and I went back to sleep at 4 I woke up 7saayt glbyy kaan bwgf. I talked to 3aziz bs he wasn't answering so I thought maybe he's with his friend aw shyy. I was sitting in the living room I was checking my fb when I saw a guys status Allah yr7m 3ziz al flanii. It was the same name of 3ziz I freaked out 6rsht a msg 7g the guy asked him whts the name of the guys father. But he took a while to answer so I told my friend to call him. She did and she called me she told me that it was him. I broke down I stayed a 2 weeks nt in the mood to talk to anyone I would cry every once in a while. After a year I had this guy friend that I knew for 3 years he told me that he loved me. I told him that I can't. He said that he understand and now a7s I'm falling for him. I don't knw wht to do if I tell him a7s inaa I will feel bad lnaa a5oon 3aziz Allah yr7ma :(.


_________________________________


I hope you are feeling better..

My Heart..

Dedicated to Him..


____________________________






I love you, my heart would whisper every time you I see you...

You look at me, a hint of amusement in your eyes..

Did you hear that?

Of course not, because I have taught my heart the art of silence..

The art of thinking, but never talking aloud..

It betrays me sometimes, with a whisper escaping its closed chambers..

But you can't hear it..

Because my heart beats always manage to be louder..

Louder than its whispers,

louder than its sobs,

louder than its hopes..

My heart cries silently some more..

begging me to allow it to talk, to scream, to be heard..

It shivers as you get closer..

It begs me again..

It vows that it would be just one time..

Just one time, my heart would say,

It's just one time that it wants to be heard..

You stand in front of me..

I hold my breath..

For a moment, my heart stops beating..

My heart can hear you, you say..

My heart knows..

You place your hand on my heart,

You touched my heart..

You touched my soul..

You touched me..

And I can never forget that..

But you can..

and you already did..


_____________________________


I will post the story whenever i'm free..
Im sorry walla.. adry maleetaw min the random posts..

My say on the shared story..

This is dedicated to sara for being brave and sharing her story..
This is my advice to you..
Simply.. Follow your heart..


_________________________________________






From what I read, I don't think that a7mad is the one your heart is set upon. I see Fahad being the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Now, whether you should pursue him or not, no you shouldn't. Fate will bring you together, and your love will blossom in the right way. If you ever do see him, maybe you should let him know that you do love him. Not directly, just try to get the message across subtly, 3ashan yadry ina you still want him to be part of your life. Give him the green light, but the rest is up to him.

If he did hurt you, forgive and forget. You are hurting yourself more by choosing not to forgive him. Everything can be fixed. If he cut right through your heart, it can be stitched again. Scars define us as human beings, and they make us more beautiful and real.

Whether you end up marrying him or not, w inshallah you will, be sure that your husband is the one for you. You will love him more than you loved anyone else, w after all your years together you will look back and think that you didn't love anyone else. You had feelings for people before, but your feelings for your husband will be surely different.

Should you tell your husband about the people you used to love? No, you shouldn't, and that is my alterable opinion. I haven't thought about this point thoroughly, but I think if I was in your place, I would leave that detail out of our conversation. If you were asked, you tell the truth of course. But otherwise, you don't need to bring the subject up.

Final Note: I am a firm believer in love. You will be united with your loved one, even if you didn't expect to spend the rest of your life with this person. If it's meant to be, then it will be.


______________________________


Hope this helped..

Shared Story

Hello :)
So below is someone's story..
she would like to share it with you and just let it all out. .
please offer advice if you have any..
Otherwise.. it just helps to talk to someone who doesn't know you..
So i Guess this can be considered as part of the healing process..

*Names have been changed..

_________________________________








i guess today was the day i decided to let go of it all!
I wonder when did I first learn to love?
At the age of 13 I made that decision to commit…
Not to any one, but a member of the royal family…was I that materialistic from a young age??!! Did the watches he gave me blind my eyes…was I charmed with his smile, did his light tan really make me love him??!!
But based on what did I think I’m in love…the smile I felt forming across my check bones, or the heartbeats I felt pumping in my chest?? Or was I simply trying to making every girl jealous by putting my hands on the new item that dropped in school??!!
I guess a7mad was overwhelmed with my beauty himself, I myself came from a high class well known family..i knew the standers I was expected to end up with and thus I aimed for.
You may say I’m the type of girl that get’s what she wants… I put my eyes on something, I work on getting it and yes you guessed it right I actually do get it…and like all of you, as soon as I get it I feel like I don’t need it anymore…
Stuff moved fast and the next thing you know, I had my first boyfriend…he’s just a year older than me..14 at the time…
We were the young sweet hearts….my friends would gather around us and smile at the image of us sitting next to each other…you’d hear one call out: ‘you’ll end up having gorgeous babies.’
After 2 weeks of passion, I was forced to leave a7mad…since my sister found out…she had no chose but to tell my mother…everyone at school was talking about us!
So we broke up…I guess that’s when I realized I really liked him…
No..the story doesn’t end here…it goes on…but not with Nasser…
I felt really lonely at this stage of my life, that’s when my friends grew closer to me…
But that’s when the unexpected happened….my friends ex-boyfriend claims he’s into me…
He’s no more than a brother…
We grew closer as we talked, he paid attention to what I said, he listened and respected me…he himself comes from a well known family.
I started to like him…I admit…
As I grew older I knew whats wrong and whats right, whats acceptable in our society and whats not, that’s when I backed out….
Long story short..i guess my so called friend, the hand that pulled me from the dead is the same that wants to spend his life with me!
I was shocked..but I left everything as it is and moved on…
After 5 years…this same person comes back..holding the same exact feeling for me..
But now is it love??
Im much grown, my brain can digest this all.
I know for a fact a friend of mine holds feelings for him…but she hurt me once…was I the kind of person to hurt her back?!
I sit with myself, and yes I saw a future for both of us…a possibility maybe
Until..he thought he knew me well…
That’s when I said goodbye…
Are those two men I know worth me?? I don’t think so..a7mad..oh my I guess bumping into you now will just decide if there was ever love…I admit I hate my self for thinking I loved you..you where a crush..nothing but that….why did I ruin my past with you…how can I ever stand in front of my husband and say yes I did have a boyfriend…or should I lie….everything is different now….
But you fahad…you knew so much….you knew about a7mad….you still took me as I am…but to use me to show yourself how much of a man you are then your wrong….im worth so much as I know it…I stood with my head high on graduation night, I looked in your fathers eyes thinking ill be part of your life one day…but sadly my fairy tale got shattered….
If I was to ask you something now I’d just ask if you really loved me?? was I really gonna be the mother of your children??
To be honest you’re the only man I felt warm as I talked to…you made me smile and feel upset…but hell yes you hurt me, you said what no one else had said…so as much as you wanted me to be yours I wanna make you stay away…
Ive always been know for being a strong person but I guess when I see you, I’ll know if what I did is the right thing or not..
Thankyou for reading…I feel so much better now, and knowing that all your readers might read this makes me smile…
I guess you were right opening up is what I really needed…am I alone?? No im not…ive got my family…and that’s enough..and you and your readers are for sure part of it.
Thankyou again
sara..


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Inshallah I will post soon..

My fairytale..

Hello again :)
So I received emails from some people.. asking about my own love story..
So I decided to write this post,
and of course, since I am not that discrete, people are starting to 'discover' my identity ;p
So i decided to clear things up :)
Ya3ny im letting you, my lovely readers, in..


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My story..

a bit complicated,

yet very typical..

girl loves boy.. not sure if love is the word though..

Sometimes I feel like it's an understatement..

Boy (or man in my case since he is older - and let us just keep it at that) does not know about girl..

Maybe he does, but he's choosing to ignore?

I mean come on, sometimes I feel like "In love" is practically written on my forehead or something..

Or maybe he wants to do something about it but is waiting for the right time?

But then again, I think that's just my mind playing games..

Anyways..

So their paths cross sometimes..

Is it fate?

Or is he just trying to torture her?

Or is she over-analyzing everything to do with him?

All of the above maybe?

Who knows..

So she lives for the hope that she will see him..

She wakes up wishing that he will pass by today..

She fears losing him..

losing the hope for a future together..

They have nothing..

no history together..

a clean record when it comes to each other..

But in her heart.. he is all there is to her past and her future..

She loves him?

Again, is an understatement..

Does he?

Who knows..

Fine.. no he doesn't ..

but then again, he might..

Is it going to work out?

That is for all of us to find out..

Let us just hope that she finds the strength to wait patiently..

the power to watch silently..

and the heart to love secretly..



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So my dear readers.. what I write..
is a figment of my imagination, and I did mention this earlier..
it might be based on a glance, a word (not directed to me even), or simply from all the feelings that I have inside of me..

I know that some of you were thinking its a long, never-ending love story..

bas inshallah I am hoping that someday it will turn into one..
and we will love happily ever after :)

Feel free to share your stories too..

and if you want me to post about your story, then email it to me
shushuxd@gmail.com

and I will do just that!

Take care ;)

Tonight..

Hello :)
madry shfeeny I'm posting a lot these days even though im really busy ;p
I guess I just have a lot of feelings bottled up inside of me..
Some are too sacred for me to share..
But some manage to escape the restrictions I have put for them..
I will leave you with the post..


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I beg you to come tonight..

Let us hold hands under the glowing moon..

Let us count the scattered stars..

Let us name all the trees..

Let us call out for the migrating birds..

Let us play with the wet sand..

Let us fight the cold ocean waves..

Let us fall on our backs..

Let us laugh at our silliness..

Let us pretend we're kings and queens..

Let us rule the world together..

Let us be the best of friends..

Let us be lovers..

Let us love and be loved..

Let us hug one time only..

Let us look into each other's eyes..

Let us fall asleep in each other's arms..

Let our innocent love bloom..

Come and visit me in my dreams once more..

I beg you to come tonight..



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Hope u liked it..
I will post a part for the story soon inshallah!! :)

Meant to Be (Part 41)

Hiii :)
The part is finally written ;p
w why is the blogger world sleeeeeeping??!

This one is dedicated to:
Dont.Dwell, bint almeharir, madliar, A, and hano.Oshi


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----- M7ammad


Shai5a decided that she didn't want to go shopping anymore. It was the weekend so we had family gathering to attend, and so we were somewhat busy.

Ti7ajibat Shai5a on Saturday, a day before university.

"You look gorgeous.." I told her, kissing her forehead.

"La tjamilny.." She pouted.

"Walla 9ij you look beautiful.." I tried encouraging her, as I pushed her through the door.

"M7ammad.. I don't look nice.. please I don't want people to see me like this.." She said, trying to get back in.

"Yummaaaaaaa.. Shai5a ti7ajibat.. ta3alaw shoofoohaaaa!!" I screamed.

"M7ammaaaad!!" She hid her face.

We were interrupted by the camera flashes and screams of children. Everyone was excited and hyper, especially the little children because they loved her so much.

After all the congratulations and endless chitchats, we headed to our room at night.

"I really don't feel like going to uni tomorrow.." She complained after we were tucked in bed.

"You're going to love it.. don't worry.." I assured her.

"Bas my friends kilhum ra7aw engineering w one of them medicine w il bajee are studying abroad.. ya3ny no one is with me in English Lit.." She complained.

"Don't worry.. you'll do fine.." I laughed.

She sighed, worriedly.

"Good night.." I told her, smoothing her hair.

"Sweet Dreams.." She replied, smiling.

The next day was spent trying to calm Shai5a's nerves before she goes to university; I was going to drop her off before I go to work. So I spent all the way comforting her, even though she was not really paying attention to me, which meant she wasn't paying attention to the road. She was up for a surprise of course, and she was clueless.

I got to the university, opened the car's door, and walked her to the door.

"M7ammad.. hathy moo il jam3a!!" She said after a while of starring at the building.

"Imbala.. this is where you are going to be studying for the next 7 years.." I told her.

"M7ammad!!! Hathy kuliyat il 6ib!" She replied, dumbfounded.

"I know.. yalla you don't want to be late for your first lecture!" I laughed at her expression.

"Bas.." She trailed off, still shocked.

"Look.. I know that it's your dream to be a doctor, you told me so, and I asked my sisters more about it and all of them said so.. Therefore, I went to your father and told him that I want you to be a doctor so that we can understand each other more.. which is of course BS because we don't really need that.. anyways.. so he didn't mind.. fa sa7abt awragech min english literature, and now you are officially a medical student.." I explained.

"No way!" She said wide-eyed.

"Shai5a!! Yalla you're going to be late!!" I told her, pushing her inside.

"Umbaaaay!!" She said, finally realizing what was happening.

"Di5lay.." I laughed as I pointed to the door.

"Oh my god M7ammad.." She hugged me tightly.

I kissed her forehead, smiling, and pointed at the door when she let go of me.

"Ok.." She breathed, as she pushed the door and entered.

I smiled to myself, knowing that I did the right thing, and went to work, making a mental note to pick her up on time.



----- Shai5a


The time was going by really fast, and thankfully, I saw a couple of familiar faces so we walked together for the rest of the day. The professors seemed ok, and were just introduced to the program and the course outline.

It was time to leave so I said good-bye to my friends, and took some books and handouts that were handed out to us, and went outside looking for him.

He waved, as he got out of the car and took my books from me.

"La2.. 3adee ana asheelhum!" I told him.

"I got it!!" He said, carrying them, and putting them in the trunk.

I held his hand and excitedly chatted about my day, while he played with my fingers and listened intently.

"Ya3ny are you happy now?" He asked.

"More than happy.. ecstatic.. walla M7ammad you have no idea how grateful I am to you.. I love you.." I blabbered, but when I realized what I just said, I stopped and placed my hand on my mouth shutting it.

"Wayed wala shwaya?" He asked, teasing me.

I remained quiet, dumbfounded by how fast things were progressing.

"I love you too, you know.." He said, kissing my pinky.

The rest of the ride was silent of course, with my insides all churning and my heart basically running marathons.



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Hope you enjoyed :)